


Near You Always

by ACamp_toner



Category: Pitch Perfect (Movies)
Genre: Eventual Smut, F/F, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Light Angst
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-08-30
Updated: 2015-08-30
Packaged: 2018-04-18 05:06:03
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 8
Words: 21,156
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4693145
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ACamp_toner/pseuds/ACamp_toner
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>As Aubrey and Stacie grow closer, Aubrey discovers that Stacie spends a lot of time writing songs to express her feelings. Aubrey is intrigued but Stacie isn't very willing to share that part of herself initially. (This is main Staubrey and very limited, alluded to Bechloe.)</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Effortless

**Author's Note:**

> A/N: I posted this story on FFN awhile ago and it's (I think) complete. I'm just going to post all the chapters at once. Please review if you like. :)

"Hey Bree, wanna come out to dinner with me and Beca?" Chloe asked as she passed by Aubrey's bedroom door.

"Thanks, but Stacie is going to come over and watch a movie in a little bit. We're ordering pizza."

"Okay, cool," Chloe said. She turned to leave but hesitated at the door a second.

"Spit it out."

"This is like your third time hanging out alone with Stacie in the past couple weeks. Is there something going on there?" Chloe smiled and wiggled her eyebrows.

"No! We're just friends. And, jesus Chloe, you hang out with Beca  _every day_  - is there something going on there?" Aubrey realized this was a stupid comparison almost as soon as she said it because of  _course_  there was something going on with her and Beca, they just didn't know it yet.

"Point taken. Fine, have fun watching your movie. I'll try to stay out extra late for you," Chloe winked.

"Shut up," Aubrey said as she rolled her eyes.

* * *

"So what movie did you have in mind for tonight?" Stacie asked as she plopped herself down on the couch and got comfortable.

"I was gonna let you pick this time."

"What?"

"You pick."

"No way! Where is my Aubrey and what have you done with her?"

Aubrey laughed, ignoring the small jolt in her stomach at the words 'my Aubrey.' "Shut up, it's only because I can't decide what mood I'm in and it'll be easier to have someone else pick."

"So, let me get this straight, I can pick out  _any_  movie and you will watch it with me?"

"Yes. Pick out whatever you want."

"You are so going to regret this," Stacie said as she grabbed the computer to scroll through their Netflix options. After a bit of searching, Stacie sat back with a satisfied grin.

"So, what are we watching?"

"The Exorcist." Aubrey froze.

"No way, not uh. Do not want. No." Aubrey shook her head vigorously.

"You said you would watch any movie with me!"

"I don't do scary movies, okay? I can't."

Stacie waved her off. "Oh, you'll be fine. I'll be here. You  _are_  watching this movie with me, Posen. And next time maybe you'll think twice before giving me the power to pick." Aubrey slumped back on the couch and crossed her arms, defeated.

"You are very adorable when you pout," Stacie teased as she lightly pinched Aubrey's cheek.

Aubrey tried to cover her blush by standing up and stomping to the other side of the room in mock protest. She grabbed her phone. "I'm ordering the pizza - half cheese, half pepperoni and mushroom?"

"You know it, boring cheese girl."

This is why Aubrey loved hanging out with Stacie. It was so easy, she never had to think about what to say or pretend to be anything she wasn't. Stacie would see right through her if she tried to pretend anyway. She didn't feel so uptight when Stacie was around. Stacie felt the same way about hanging out with Aubrey. It just seemed.. effortless.

Except lately they were both feeling like it wasn't as  _effortless_  as they initially thought. Sure, it was easy to be themselves and, sure, there was pretty much no where each of them would rather be than in each other's company... But it took Stacie a lot of  _effort_  not to stare too intently into Aubrey's eyes when she was speaking passionately about something. It took a lot of  _effort_  for Aubrey to keep a safe, 'friendly' distance. And, increasingly, it took a lot of  _effort_  to make sure their playfulness with each other didn't turn into full on flirting.

Stacie turned off all the lights because apparently scary movies  _must_  be watched in the dark. She curled up next to Aubrey on the couch, almost touching but not quite. The movie began and each girl got engrossed in the film. Aubrey was thoroughly creeped out by the movie right from the start.

A half hour into the film, a knock on the door made Aubrey jump and grab Stacie's hand. She quickly dropped it and blushed, both girls laughing it off a little nervously. Aubrey made her way to the door and paid for their pizza. They ate their pizza quietly as they continued the movie. Aubrey could sense Stacie looking over at her every once in awhile but she assumed it was to gauge her reaction to the movie and nothing more.

* * *

Aubrey was at the dry erase board with Chloe just before rehearsals the next day when Stacie sauntered up to them. She looked at Aubrey with a little smirk on her face. "You look like you didn't get much sleep last night, Bree," she said teasingly with a wink.

Aubrey saw Chloe's eyes widen in response and she shot her a death glare. "She made me watch a scary movie," she said to Chloe pointedly. She turned to Stacie. "It's never fun to be on the receiving end of my revenge plans."

"That's definitely true. I can totally attest to that," Chloe chirped.

Stacie laughed. "Bring it on, Posen." Aubrey watched her turn and walk back to her usual pre-rehearsal spot on the bleachers.

Every time Stacie got to rehearsal early, or there was downtime in the middle of rehearsal, she took out the same thick, black journal-type notebook and began writing. It wasn't a constant stream of writing, Aubrey noticed, more like a quick jot and a lot of contemplating. She thought it was so cute when Stacie lightly chewed on the eraser at the end of her pencil. Aubrey wondered what she wrote in there but hadn't had the opportunity to ask.

Aubrey also wondered where Stacie disappeared to immediately after every rehearsal. She never stuck around but Aubrey didn't think she went back to her room either. She would normally just ask if she was curious but for some reason, she felt that Stacie wanted to keep whatever she was doing private or she would have mentioned it herself. Maybe, Aubrey's stomach clenched a little at the thought, she was meeting someone every day after rehearsals. Aubrey knew Stacie was a bit sexually promiscuous but Stacie hadn't mentioned anything or anyone in a few weeks at least. Aubrey just assumed that Stacie would tell her but maybe not.

Aubrey decided it was silly not to ask Stacie things she was curious about. Stacie is her friend and it shouldn't matter. The brunette was engrossed in her work when Aubrey approached quietly. "What do you write about in there?" Stacie startled with a yelp, quickly shutting the notebook and shoving it into her bag.

"Oh, that? It's nothing, really. Just little thoughts." Aubrey wasn't used to seeing Stacie on edge about anything.

"Like a diary?"

"What? No. Well - I don't know. I guess, maybe, sort of something like that?"

"Oh. Okay." Aubrey was a bit hurt that Stacie didn't seem to want her to know about it. It wasn't like Aubrey was trying to read it, she would never, but it seemed Stacie didn't even want her to know about it at all.

Stacie could read the hurt in Aubrey's eyes even though the blonde kept them downcast. "I write songs," Stacie said quietly. Aubrey's eyes shot up to Stacie's. "It's just - I don't know. It's sort of like a diary in that way. All my feelings go into lyrics. I've been writing songs since I was a little girl." Stacie looked away and Aubrey could tell she wasn't used to telling people this about herself.

"Wow, that's really amazing, actually." Aubrey watched Stacie's face redden a little. "What do you do about music? I've never really understood how songwriting works."

"I make the music too." Aubrey's eyes widened.

"So, you make actual songs, then? Do you perform any? Have you recorded any? Can I hear one?"

"No, absolutely not." Stacie waved her firmly between them as she stood up, effectively ending the conversation and making it known that she did not want it brought up again.

Aubrey tried to catch Stacie after rehearsal but as usual, the brunette had disappeared before Aubrey even had the chance to look for her. Aubrey wasn't about to approach Stacie about where she jets off to, not after the girl's reaction to the writing thing. She thought maybe it would be best to just wait for Stacie to mention it herself if she wants to. Or, Aubrey's mind started working, she could find out where Stacie goes without Stacie knowing. She wondered how hard it would be to follow Stacie after rehearsals one day.

* * *

Aubrey wasn't going to have a chance to try to follow Stacie after rehearsals the next day because she and Chloe were having all the girls over for a get-together and she needed to go home and make sure the house was ready.

"Chloe, how much alcohol do you think these girls are going to drink?" She surveyed the large amount of alcohol that was taking over their kitchen counter space.

"I don't know! I wanted to make sure everyone had something that suits their tastes." That statement was probably the epitome of Chloe, always trying to make sure everyone had everything they needed to be the happiest they could be.

Aubrey finished putting out various snacks when the doorbell rang. The girls streamed in fairly consistently until almost everyone was present - except Stacie. Aubrey tried not to think about it but she knew she would be disappointed if the brunette didn't show. Aubrey went into the kitchen and scanned her drink options. Amy had already set up camp and was mixing some things together.

"Want me to make ya somethin'?" Amy asked.

"Yes, please." Aubrey didn't care what. She didn't want to feel the need to be in control tonight like she always is. It's exhausting sometimes.

Aubrey was three drinks in when Stacie finally showed up and she was definitely feeling them. She didn't want to seem overly excited that Stacie was there so she remained on the couch with her drink. Aubrey kept her eyes off of the brunette but, out of the corner of her eye, she watched Stacie look around the room until her eyes finally stilled when they reached Aubrey. The blonde felt a twinge of something in the pit of her stomach, knowing that Stacie was clearly looking for her because her eyes stopped searching when they found her.

Aubrey turned towards Stacie, meeting her eyes and the tall girl made her way to the couch. "Stacie! You're here!" Aubrey couldn't help the grin that took over her face.

"And you are drunk, apparently! I get here a little late and miss all of the fun?"

"No, you just got here so the fun's just beginning." Aubrey winked.

"Smooth, Posen. Real smooth. And I'm jusssttt gonnnnaa go ahead and take this from you," Stacie said as she took Aubrey's drink. She chugged it down and stood to go get another.

Aubrey grabbed Stacie's hand. "Don't leave me. You just got here."

"I'm just going to go get a drink. You stay here and save my spot."

Aubrey stayed put and her eyes scanned the room. They reached Chloe and Beca who were sitting closely and whispering to each other, giggling. Aubrey felt a pang of jealously as she watched them together. They may not know yet in what way they're into each other, but Aubrey can see that they will soon. Aubrey realized then just how lonely she felt most of the time. She hadn't had a boyfriend since she went through a string of them during her crazy second semester as a freshman. She was usually too focused on school to mind but lately she's been wanting something more.

Aubrey could sense the moment her 'fun buzz' turned into 'emotional drunk' and she had enough sense to not want anyone else to witness it. Stacie came back with her drink just as Aubrey was standing to leave.

"Where are you going?"

"I - I don't feel so good." Aubrey knew she needed to get out of there fast.

Stacie set down her drink and gently grabbed Aubrey's arm. "Are you okay?"

"I'm going to go lay down." She pushed by Stacie and half-heartedly swatted her hand away when she reached out for Aubrey again.

"Aubrey, let me help you. I'll bring you to your room."

Aubrey didn't say anything in response but she let Stacie walk with her to her room. Stacie hadn't actually ever been inside Aubrey's room and it didn't seem like Aubrey was going to let that change. The blonde began going into the door and stood in the frame as she turned around to look at Stacie. Stacie couldn't read Aubrey's body language but she figured the girl really must not be feeling well because she seemed pretty  _off_.

Aubrey leaned forward and softly gave Stacie a peck on the cheek. "Thanks for watching out, Stace. Love you," she said as she disappeared inside her room. Stacie stood there for several moments trying to process what just happened. It was so confusing to her because it was all so casually done but Aubrey had never kissed her cheek before. And she had certainly never said "love you" before either. Friends do that though, right? Stacie had never had many girls that she could call her friend but she was  _pretty_   _sure_  girls do those casual acts of affection. She really shouldn't read into it because that's probably all it was. The problem, Stacie realized after a bit, was how disappointed she was in thinking it was nothing more than casual.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: Thanks for reading this first chapter. First chapters are my least favorite to write.


	2. Near You Always

Aubrey made her way to the rehearsal room. She was very early but there was no point in going back home and maybe she could get some reading done for one of her classes. She was pulling out the key to the room when muffled music coming from the other side of the door made her pause. She frowned slightly, her brow furrowing. She was pretty sure no one had this rehearsal hall right before them.

She twisted the knob and found the door locked. She put her key in the lock and quietly opened the door. Her eyes widened in surprise when she peered into the room.

Stacie was sitting at the piano with her back to Aubrey, her fingers playing the keys with an experienced swiftness. The music was gorgeous and as she listened intently, she heard Stacie start humming. Aubrey felt like she was invading a private moment but she couldn't turn away. She was mesmerized by the sound and by Stacie's hands moving along the keys.

Aubrey isn't sure how long she stood there - it could have been a few seconds or several minutes - but eventually the song slowed and ended softly.

"I didn't know you could play," Aubrey said softly into the new silence.

Stacie whipped around, caught by surprise. "Aubrey," she breathed. "How long have you been standing there?"

"Not long. I'm sorry, I - I didn't mean to intrude. I didn't know you were in here." Stacie just nodded and turned back to the piano to gather her things. "How'd you get in here anyway?"

Stacie turned her head slightly towards the blonde and Aubrey felt a wave of relief when she saw a familiar smirk on her face. "The custodian has a crush," she shrugged and Aubrey let out a laugh.

Aubrey made her way to the piano. "That was really beautiful, you know. What is it?"

Stacie shifted uncomfortably in her seat. Aubrey didn't like seeing the normally confident girl be so hesitant. "I haven't named it yet."

Aubrey's eyes widened. "Wait, you created that music?"

Stacie blushed and gave a curt nod.

"Stacie! That's incredible," Aubrey said, the awe evident in her voice. Aubrey can sing, sure, but she's never been musically inclined in the form of instruments. Well, she hasn't exactly  _tried_  any instruments but anything that she can't perfect quickly is not for her.

"Thanks," Stacie said sheepishly. They sat for a moment in comfortable silence.

"Hey, do you want to get coffee after rehearsal today?" Aubrey didn't plan the invite, it just sort of fell out of her mouth.

"Well, I usually - um. Actually, yeah. Let's do it, " Stacie said with smile, suddenly returning to the Stacie that Aubrey was used to. Aubrey desperately wanted to ask Stacie to play her another song but wasn't sure the brunette would respond favorably to that request.

"Are you feeling better from last night?" Stacie asked as she moved to her usual pre-rehearsal place in the room.

Aubrey's eyebrows furrowed for a second before she remembered her quick escape from the night before. "Good as new," she said breezily. "Alcohol and I don't mix very well."

"You're drinking the wrong stuff. I'll teach you," Stacie winked and both of them laughed.

"That sounds like trouble."

"Always."

* * *

Aubrey stood at the counter in the cafe waiting for their drinks while Stacie went to find them a place to sit. The cafe was always crowded this time of day. Aubrey tapped her finger absentmindedly on the counter. She felt kind of nervous but she didn't know why. Coffee with Stacie.. no big deal. Friends having coffee. Nothing crazy.

Aubrey scanned the room after the drinks were handed to her. She finally spotted Stacie in a corner booth, the brunette giving her an adorable little wave when their eyes met. By the time Aubrey made her way to the table, the younger girl was on the phone and Aubrey just caught the end of the one-sided conversation. "-sorry. Something came up. I'll just see you later, okay?" A short pause as Aubrey sat down, Stacie's eyes shifting towards her and then away. Aubrey felt a small pang of something unidentifiable in her stomach. She wondered who Stacie was talking to and who she was going to see 'later.' Aubrey shook off the feeling.  _Jesus, you don't own her. Who cares what she does?_

"Yeah, same time as always. See you then." Stacie ended the call and put her phone away. "Sorry about that." Stacie grinned at Aubrey and the blonde couldn't help the automatic grin she returned.

Aubrey handed Stacie her coffee and tried not to stare at her lips as she took a drink. Stacie caught her looking and quirked her eyebrow. "Do I have something on my face, Posen?" Stacie stuck out her tongue playfully.

Aubrey blushed and tried to cover it up with a laugh. "No, I was just waiting for you to spill coffee all over yourself, per usual."

"Shut up! That happened  _one time_ ," Stacie laughed as she rolled her eyes. She paused for a second. "I missed you last night," the brunette said a little more seriously than she intended.

"You saw me last night."

"Yeah, for two seconds before you left me all alone."

Aubrey chuckled. "Don't be dramatic. There was a whole party's worth of people there."

"Yeah but  _they_  weren't the ones I wanted to be with." Stacie's eyes twinkled and Aubrey's stomach filled with butterflies.

"Well.." Aubrey hesitated because she originally wasn't going to bring this up during this conversation. "I have an idea on a way we could spend a little more time together."

Stacie raised her eyebrows. "Do tell."

"I was wondering-" Aubrey looked around the cafe, stalling for a second. "-okay, so I've always wanted to learn how to play the piano, a little." Aubrey felt like this was a stupid idea but when Stacie didn't immediately shoot her down, she rushed on. "I know you can play and I was wondering if you, maybe, wanted to show me how. I mean, just the basics, nothing fancy. And there's a good chance I'll quit after about one session, but…"

Stacie laughed. "That is definitely not where I thought you were taking this conversion." Aubrey looked up, her brows furrowed in confusion. "I'm kidding, I'm kidding. Sure, Bree. I'd love to work with you on the piano. I can't say I'm much of a teacher but I think we can muddle through."

Aubrey sat back with a satisfied grin. She stopped herself from evaluating where, exactly, this sudden interest in the piano came from.

* * *

Aubrey and Stacie agreed to meet 45 before rehearsals the next day to get started with the piano thing. Stacie wasn't lying when she said she wasn't much of a teacher - she had no idea where to even start in showing Aubrey anything about the piano. She tried to think back on her first lessons but she was practically a toddler and doesn't remember. She wouldn't have ever agreed to this in a million years if anyone else had asked her. What made Aubrey different?

Stacie sat close to Aubrey on the piano bench. "Is there anything you already know?"

Aubrey hit middle C and scaled up, singing 'do, re, mi, fa, so, la, ti, do' as she did. It made Stacie's job easier that Aubrey clearly already knew how to read music and hit the beginning notes. Stacie showed Aubrey a simple melody to play. It was repetitive and annoying but it would help strengthen her fingers.

Aubrey tried it after Stacie and messed it up. Stacie showed her again and, again, Aubrey couldn't follow. Stacie could sense the perfectionist getting frustrated. "Here.." Stacie put her hand lightly on top of Aubrey's and felt the girl tense. Aubrey felt a shiver shoot up her spine. "Like this.." Stacie said softly as her fingers pressed into Aubrey's to make the proper melody.

"O-okay. Will you do it like that a few more times?" Stacie complied and moved her hand with Aubrey's several more times until Aubrey could play it by herself. Stacie gave Aubrey a big grin when she completed it on her own. Stacie made Aubrey do it so many times that Aubrey didn't even have to think about how her fingers were moving.

Both of the girls lost track of time until the door flinging open made Stacie jump up and move quickly away from the piano. Stacie immediately blushed and felt silly. She and Aubrey weren't doing anything wrong in there. Why did she feel like she was being caught out?

Amy, Jessica and Ashley walked in chatting. If they noticed that Stacie and Aubrey had been alone in the room together, sitting very closely, they didn't let on or mention it. Aubrey stood up and started readying her things for rehearsal and Stacie drifted to her normal pre-rehearsal spot.

Aubrey tried her best to act completely normal during rehearsal but she was a little distracted. Chloe kept shooting her a concerned look and Aubrey had to wave her off more than once. For her part, Stacie was acting completely fine - joking with Amy about something sexual that Aubrey was sure she didn't want to hear.

"Hey Chlo, will you lock up after rehearsal? I have to get out of here pretty quickly," Aubrey asked the redhead as nonchalantly as possible, hoping she didn't ask any questions. Aubrey really wanted to know where Stacie goes after rehearsals.

"Oh, yeah, sure," Chloe said, distracted. She was watching Beca work on choreography and Aubrey couldn't help but roll her eyes. As she did, she caught Stacie staring at her. Stacie looked from Aubrey to Chloe, who was still starting at Beca, and smirked. Aubrey chuckled to herself.

As rehearsal came to an end, Aubrey trailed Stacie out of the room but it was harder than she thought it would be. There weren't a lot of people around and she didn't want Stacie to see her so she held back pretty far and ended up almost losing the girl in a series of turns. She caught sight of Stacie just as she was going into a room. Aubrey looked around, failing to notice her surroundings before then as she was so intent on following Stacie. Aubrey noticed she was in the music department and Stacie had entered one door in a series of doors along a long hallway.

Aubrey peered into a similar door closer to where she was and saw a small space, almost no bigger than a janitor's closet. It held a small wall piano and a few music stands but that's all that would fit. Aubrey pulled her eyes away from the room as she heard footsteps approaching from down the hall. Aubrey looked behind her shoulder and saw a lean, muscular guy making his way toward her. He was really good looking, Aubrey noticed.

Aubrey's heart stopped for a beat as the guy turned into the room that Stacie had gone through a few moments before. She heard the guy greet Stacie by saying in a confident, cocky tone: "Hey, hope you're ready for me today."

"When have I ever not been ready for you?" Aubrey could practically  _hear_  Stacie wink. "Lock the door - we don't need anyone barging in like last time." Aubrey's stomach clenched. She felt her face get hot and her eyes were threatening to tear up.  _What is your problem?_  Aubrey couldn't identify her feelings and she did not appreciate that one bit. She heard a sort of thump sound coming from the room and she turned immediately around and fled out of the building, not wanting to hear any more.

* * *

Aubrey paced her room, trying to get a grip on what she was feeling. She remembered the shiver she got when Stacie placed her hand over hers at the piano. She remembered the horrible feeling in the pit of her stomach when she heard Aubrey talking to that guy. And she couldn't even describe what she was feeling at the idea of Stacie hooking up with that guy in that small rehearsal space. Aubrey isn't an illogical person. It took her most of the night but she finally admitted to herself that her feelings towards Stacie weren't exactly platonic. She wasn't willing to admit any more than that.

The next morning, Aubrey still couldn't manage to untie the knots in her stomach from the previous day. She shot Stacie a quick text telling her that she couldn't make it to their piano practice before rehearsal. She didn't trust herself to act normal yet. She needed to give it some time. Aubrey's stomach fluttered when she received a text from Stacie with a sad face.

Aubrey muddled through her day. She couldn't really pay attention in any of her classes even though she tried to throw herself into her work (which usually worked superbly). Aubrey found herself with over an hour to kill before rehearsals and she was going insane. She knew she told Stacie she couldn't meet for piano practice but she thought maybe she could go and practice what Stacie had showed her the day before. It would take up just enough of her concentration so that she couldn't think of other things.

Aubrey felt a moment of déjà vu as she stopped in front of the rehearsal room door and, again, heard music coming from the other side. She froze for a minute. She knew it had to be Stacie on the other side and she didn't know how to proceed. Aubrey's curiosity got the better of her, though, and she opened the door as quietly as possible, hoping to listen to a little of the music and leave without Stacie being any of the wiser.

Stacie could feel the moment Aubrey walked into the room. She didn't turn and her hands didn't falter on the keys; she didn't want the older girl to know that she knew she was there. Stacie didn't know why Aubrey canceled their practice just to show up on her own but she didn't really care. This gave Stacie an opportunity to do something she would normally be too scared to do: play for Aubrey. For some reason, Stacie felt less vulnerable singing her song to Aubrey when she knew Aubrey thought she was spying unnoticed.

Stacie smoothly transitioned the music she was playing to the music of her newest song. She softly, but strongly, started singing.

_Please don't say I love you_  
_Those words touch me much too deeply  
_ _And they make my core tremble_

Aubrey's breath hitched as she heard Stacie's voice fill the room. It was soft and sweet and so much different than it was in Bella rehearsals. Aubrey concentrated on the words, knowing instinctively that this was a song Stacie probably wrote herself.

_Don't think you realize the effect you have over me_  
_Please don't look at me like that  
_ _It just makes me want to make you near me always_

Stacie tried to hide the slight tremor in her voice, she wasn't used to any sort of act of vulnerability. She's never sung her own songs for anyone before, let alone to the person they were about. She closed her eyes and tried to focus on the music.

_Please don't kiss me so sweet_  
_It makes me crave a thousand kisses to follow_  
_And please don't touch me like that  
_ _It makes every other embrace seem pale and shallow_

Aubrey's stomach had plummeted slightly. If Stacie wrote this song recently, or was singing it now with reason, she must have someone in her life that warrants those words. Her mind flashed to an image of the guy she saw yesterday.

_And please don't come so close  
_ _It just makes me want to make you near me always_

The song kept going and Aubrey felt more and more sick to her stomach. She eyes welled with tears and she chastised herself for being so stupid. How could she possibly think that a girl like  _Stacie_  didn't already have feelings for someone. Of course she did. And Aubrey knew she wasn't the only one with feelings for the brunette either.

_And it makes me want to make you near me always_  
_I want to be near you always  
_ _I want to be near you always_

Stacie softly played the ending notes of the song and took a deep breathe. She turned to face Aubrey, a million thoughts going through her head and a million butterflies flying around her stomach.

But Aubrey was gone.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: Although Stacie writes songs for the purposes of this story, *I* do not. The song featured in this chapter (and the title of the story) was written by Jewel. It's a beautiful song, if you're interested. Also, for the purposes of this story, the songs will likely be accompanied by a piano - even though most of the songs chosen so far are actually accompanied by a guitar.


	3. Misunderstandings

Aubrey flung open the door and pushed past a startled Chloe who was getting ready to leave. Aubrey was already out of sight before Chloe could process what had just happened. She heard the bathroom door shut and, then, the telltale sound of Aubrey's body attempting to expel stress and nerves and whatever else.

"Bree?" Chloe knocked gently on the door, brow furrowed. "Are you okay? What happened?"

No response.

"Aubrey?" Chloe twisted the handle and opened the door to peer in. The blonde was sitting with her back against the bathtub, elbows resting on bent knees, forehead resting on her hands. Chloe has seen Aubrey like this before, after a particularly horrible exam or a fight with her father, or, most notably, ICCA finals the previous year. Chloe knelt down by the blonde. "Hey, wanna tell me what's going on?" she asked softly, reassuringly.

She waited patiently for Aubrey to respond, knowing the girl usually needed time.

"It's so dumb," Aubrey finally choked out. "I don't even know why I'm upset. It's fine. It's completely fine."

"You might be able to lie to yourself but clearly-" Chloe motioned between Aubrey and the toilet, "-there's something going on."

Aubrey let out a long breath. "Okay, but.. this isn't something I'm ready to evaluate yet. So can you just, I don't know,  _not_  ask me any questions? Not yet."

"Okay, I can do that."

"Have you ever discovered you like someone more than you thought? More than friends? But they already like someone else? And it's dumb because you know you probably never had a chance with them anyway - but now you know they like someone else or they're with someone else or.." Aubrey sucked in a breath. "Maybe if you had just known a little sooner that they'd never be available to you, even though you assumed that was the case anyway - maybe then you could have not ever liked them in the first place." Chloe's mind churned; she knew  _exactly_  what Aubrey was talking about. "This is so stupid. I sound like I'm in middle school right now. I'm fine, really I am. A stupid, unrequited crush, if you can even call it that, is not enough to get worked up like this. I must be hormonal or something."

"Don't do that."

"What?"

"Don't brush it off like that. It's not stupid." Chloe's instinct was to reach out and make some sort of contact with the blonde but she remembered that Aubrey doesn't like touch when she's upset. Chloe fumbled with her hands instead, feeling a little useless. "You can't help how you feel, sweetie."

"But I  _can_. And I  _will_." Chloe rolled her eyes at Aubrey's stubbornness but decided to let it go.

"I have a lot of questions."

"I know," Aubrey replied, simply. "We have to leave for rehearsals now or we'll be late, and you know those girls are completely useless without our direction." Chloe laughed.

* * *

Stacie's mind was racing. She knew she took a huge chance singing that song in front of Aubrey but she didn't really think about what would happen after the song ended. What did she expect? Maybe Aubrey didn't know the song was about her. But - then why would she disappear? Stacie was only left to conclude that Aubrey thought the song was about her and wasn't okay with it.

Stacie put her face in her hands and groaned in frustration into the empty room. She hadn't thought about how their relationship would change if Aubrey didn't return her feelings. Maybe she could just act super normal and Aubrey would assume she had been wrong about the song being about her? But wait - Aubrey didn't know that Stacie knew the blonde heard anything - so wouldn't acting like her normal, flirty self only reinforce that the song was about her? Stacie closed her eyes and felt pounding start in her head.

She didn't know how to fix this and make sure everything would stay the same. She didn't want to lose Aubrey's friendship just because she made things awkward. She could live with just being friends with Aubrey because the only other option.. well, she was pretty sure she couldn't live without her.

Stacie's mind continued to race until she came to a decision, a decision that was probably slightly risky. Stacie decided that to make all of this go away, it was imperative for her to act like nothing ever happened at all. It sort of killed her a little to know that Aubrey didn't return her feelings but she'd be damned if she lost what little time she got with the girl over some stupid crush. She would sack up and do what her grandma always told her: save her tears for the pillow. She was sure Aubrey was going to act weird with her but if she just persisted in normalcy, they would move on. If you ignore things, they go away.. right?

Stacie became more comfortable with her plan as her fellow Bellas started filling the room to rehearse. It was about 5 minutes to rehearsal time before Stacie started getting a little nervous that the blonde wasn't there. Aubrey was never later than 15 minutes early to almost anything. Should she tease her about it? Is that what she would normally do? Stacie was still caught up in trying to figure out how she normally acted when Chloe and Aubrey made their appearance, exactly on time.

Stacie rehearsed as normally as she could but Aubrey wouldn't even look at her. She was looking everywhere  _but_  at her, actually. Stacie cursed herself over and over for being stupid enough to sing her song in front of her. At the end of rehearsal, Stacie was determined to make some sort of contact with the blonde. She set her jaw in determination and walked over to where Aubrey was standing next to Chloe.

Just as Stacie opened her mouth to say something, Chloe jumped in. "Stace! Do you want to come over and watch a movie with us tonight?" The look that Aubrey shot at Chloe immediately told Stacie that this movie idea, or at least Stacie's invitation, was news to her.

"Oh. I - uh.." Stacie fumbled.

"Come on, pleeeease," Chloe said with puppy dog eyes. "Beca is coming too."

_Normal, Stacie. Be normal._ "Yeah, definitely. What time?"

"Why don't you just come with us right now?"

"Maybe she has something to do or someone to meet right now, Chloe," Aubrey said through slightly gritted teeth. Chloe looked at her, confused.

Stacie's brows furrowed in confusion as well. "No, I'm good. I can come now." Stacie gave Aubrey her best smile and watched the girl's face flush.

Stacie and Aubrey walked in silence while Chloe chatted excitedly about her classes. Beca was meeting them in a bit after she checked on a couple things at the station. When they reached Chloe and Aubrey's house, the blonde excused herself to use the bathroom. As soon as she was out of earshot, Chloe let out a sigh.

"Listen, Aubrey had a really bad day today so I wanted you to come over and for us to all hang out because I know she'd just lock herself up otherwise - and she likes hanging out with you."

"Oh? Why is she having a bad day?" Stacie asked nonchalantly.

"I don't know details - I think some guy problem. She found out her crush likes someone else, or something." Chloe said it absentmindedly, without thinking, and her eyes got big as soon as she heard the words come out. "Oh, shit. I should not have said that. What is wrong with me? Don't tell her I told you that!"

"Wait, wait. Aubrey has a crush on someone?"

Chloe groaned and fell back on the couch. "I am the worst.. the  _worst_. Don't ever tell me a secret."

"Who is it?" Stacie ignored Chloe's moral battle with herself.

"She didn't tell me." Almost as an afterthought, Chloe quickly added, "Not that I would tell you if she did!"

"Wait, when did she tell you this though?"

"Like right before rehearsals. She was a mess."

Chloe seamlessly transitioned into talking about movies as if she and Stacie were in the middle of a conversation. Stacie understood why two seconds later when Aubrey appeared in the room. Stacie needed a minute to process all of this so she got up and went into the bathroom.

Okay. These are the facts. Aubrey listened to Stacie sing. Aubrey went home. Aubrey was upset and told Chloe her crush likes someone else.

Aubrey could have been upset before she heard Stacie - it's not like Stacie turned around to see her and she  _did_  cancel their piano practice. Wouldn't Aubrey have told Stacie if she liked someone? Maybe not, it's hard to say.

But - what if Aubrey liked Stacie too? It was almost too much for Stacie to even hope for. What if Aubrey liked Stacie and thought Stacie was singing about someone else? That biting remark from the blonde about Stacie maybe needing to meet with someone after rehearsal would make more sense, if that were the case. What did Stacie do to give Aubrey the impression that she liked someone else, though? It didn't make sense that Aubrey would think that. But if it was some other random person Aubrey was upset over, why was she practically refusing to make eye contact with her? Stacie felt a surge of hope. But now what? Stacie had to change plans.

Stacie went back into the living room and was happy to see that Aubrey looked a little more like normal chatting with Chloe. They were sitting next to each other on the couch talking about what movie they wanted to watch and what to get for dinner.

"Hey, Beale. Move your butt."

"Huh?"

"You're in my spot!"

"Stace, you realize this is my house, right?"

"Yeah. And you're still in my spot. Move it."

Chloe let out a huff as she stood up. Stacie plopped down on the couch next to Aubrey with a pleased smile on her face. Aubrey moved to stand, mumbling something about water, when Stacie grabbed her arm and pulled her back down. Aubrey fell over almost on top of Stacie.

"Stay." Stacie's face looked like a petulant, demanding child.

Aubrey couldn't help but laugh, the tension she'd been holding all day eased a bit. "I'm not a dog, Stace. And I want some water." Aubrey stuck her tongue out at Stacie as she got up and made her way to the kitchen. Stacie couldn't help but appreciate the view of the blonde walking away.

"Fine!" Stacie called out after her. "I'll just be here saving your spot!"

"What-" Chloe motioned her finger from Stacie towards the kitchen where Aubrey just disappeared, "-is going on here?"

Stacie opened her mouth to reply when the doorbell rang and Chloe jumped up to get it, clearly excited about her expected guest. A moment later Beca walked into the room. She came towards Stacie as if she was gonna sit down so Stacie swung her legs up and laid them across the couch.

"Don't want me sitting next to you? Offended."

"I just promised Aubrey I'd save her spot!" Chloe quirked an eyebrow but Stacie saw the pleased expression on her face when Beca huffed and made her way over to sit by Chloe. Stacie moved her legs as Aubrey came back in the room carrying enough water for everyone.

"Can't believe you're joining us for movie night, Beca," Aubrey said.

"Yeah, well, I wasn't given much of a choice," Beca muttered and rolled her eyes toward Chloe who gave her a playful smack.

"What movie are we watching?" Stacie asked.

"I think we decided on Baby Mama," Chloe answered. "You'll like this one, Becs. It's funny!"

"Are you guys okay with Chinese food?" Aubrey asked Stacie and Beca who both agreed that Chinese sounded great. The group spent some time discussing what to get and finally called to place their orders. It was still early so they decided to wait for their food and eat before starting the movie. When Chloe and Beca went into Chloe's room to listen to Beca's latest mix, Aubrey and Stacie were left alone.

Stacie reached over to the coffee table to grab the newspaper and flipped to the crossword puzzle.

"You like doing crosswords?" Aubrey asked.

"I love them. Do you?"

"Mhm"

Stacie grabbed a pencil she saw on the table and leaned back on the couch. "Come help me then." She patted the space on the couch right next to her and Aubrey scooted over so she could see the puzzle too. Stacie's heart sped up at the blonde's closeness. "Okay, one across, six letters - geologic layers."

"Strata," Aubrey said without hesitation causing Stacie to smile wide.

"Nice. Alright, one down, five lett-" Stacie was cut off.

"You can't do one down now!"

Stacie's brow furrowed. "What?"

Aubrey sighed. "You have to go in order. Do all the ones you can get across and  _then_  do all the ones down. After that you start over and see what others you can get with clues from the letters."

"You are so weird," Stacie chuckled.

"I am not! That's how you do it!" Aubrey said indignantly.

"You're still a weirdo," Stacie said as she playfully leaned over to bump Aubrey with her shoulder. She decided to stay in place, keeping her shoulder touching Aubrey's. "But fine, we'll do it your way." Stacie suck out her tongue.

They worked methodically on the crossword puzzle. It turns out that with the two of them working on it together, there were only a few clues that they couldn't get, their areas of knowledge complimenting each other nicely. They had just finished with the across clues when their Chinese food arrived. They called out to Beca and Chloe and sat around the table eating and chatting. Aubrey found herself almost forgetting about everything that happened earlier in the day.

The girls settled on to the couches with full bellies to watch the movie. Just as the movie started, Stacie reached up behind her and grabbed the blanket that was laying over the top of the couch. "I'm chilly," she said when Aubrey gave her a strange look.

"Mm, yeah, good idea, I should probably go grab a blanket too."

"Don't be silly. We can share this one." Stacie scooted close to Aubrey and threw part of the blanket over her so it was covering each of them. She grinned as she saw Aubrey's face color a little. About 10 minutes later, Stacie slid down a little on the couch and snuggled closer to Aubrey, putting her head on the older girl's shoulder. She felt the blonde tense but ignored it.

Stacie's arm was trapped between her leg and Aubrey's so she began rubbing her thumb lightly on Aubrey's outer thigh, trying to make it seem as absentminded as possible. She heard Aubrey's breath hitch. The blonde, for her part, remained as still as a statue. If it wasn't for that one breath hitch, Stacie would not have even been positive that Aubrey was breathing.

About halfway through the movie, Stacie became a bit more brave. She adjusted how she was sitting while she slid her hand on top of Aubrey's thigh until it was under the blonde's hand that was resting on her leg. Stacie laced their fingers together. Her heart started racing and she wondered if Aubrey was going to pull her hand away but the blonde made no move. Stacie moved her head slightly on Aubrey's shoulder to sneak a glance at the blonde and she was staring fixedly at the TV.

Minutes passed and Stacie was enjoying the feel of her hand in Aubrey's. Suddenly, her own breathing hitched when she felt Aubrey's thumb begin tracing light circles on her hand. Stacie felt like her heart was going to jump out of her chest. Aubrey shrugged Stacie's head off her shoulder. Stacie looked up, confused, but Aubrey was still staring directly at the TV. Aubrey shifted and put her head on Stacie's shoulder and the brunette thought she was going to die right there on that couch. She was having trouble catching her breath.

The brunette closed her eyes, trying to control her breathing, and rested her cheek against the top of Aubrey's head. Aubrey took in a deep breath when she felt Stacie's head on her own. She didn't know what was going on but for once, she was going to try to stop analyzing and just  _be_. She felt herself let go of the tension she had been feeling all day. She closed her eyes and focused on the feel of Stacie's hand in her own and her head on the younger girl's shoulder.

The movie ended and Chloe put her arms up to stretch as she yawned. She felt a tap on her shoulder and looked at Beca.

"Dude, look," Beca whispered. Chloe looked over to where Beca was pointing and saw Stacie and Aubrey wrapped up in each other, sound asleep. Chloe couldn't help but think about how unbelievably cute the two were together.

"Should we wake them up?" Chloe whispered back.

"Nah, let's leave 'em. Come on, let's go into your room. We can wake them if they're still out before I leave." Chloe grinned, liking that idea.


	4. Absence of Fear

Stacie couldn't help smiling to herself as she made her way to the rehearsal room. Aubrey looked a little freaked out the night before when Chloe had woken them up on the couch but all Stacie can remember is the feel of Aubrey's thumb tracing circles on her hand, their fingers laced together like perfect puzzle pieces. She was fairly sure now that Aubrey liked her and Stacie planned to use this information to her advantage.

Stacie got to rehearsals a few minutes early and most of the girls were already present. She strut in and dropped her bag, reaching down to the hem of her shirt and pulling it up over her head so she was standing in just a sports bra.

"Dude, clothe yourself," Beca said, causing Aubrey to look up. Stacie flashed a grin and Aubrey's face colored but didn't leave Stacie's body.

"I'm just changing shirts, chill out. You can see twice as much when I'm in my swimsuit top." Stacie winked at Aubrey and took her time sifting through her things to get a new shirt to put on, enjoying the fact that Aubrey was now fumbling with her music binder.

And could anyone blame Stacie for choosing a shirt that basically just acted as a second skin? She saw how Aubrey's eyes lingered on her a beat longer when she was looking around to make sure everyone was present to start. Aubrey was all over the place in rehearsals that day and Chloe kept shooting her a confused look. She just couldn't focus when every time she looked at Stacie, heat flooded through her and her heart started pounding.

The girls were supposed to be partnered and working on a choreography sequence while Aubrey turned to clear off the dry erase board. She startled when she felt someone behind her. "You seem distracted today," Stacie purred in her ear before walking away. She could feel Aubrey's eyes on her backside.

Aubrey had no idea what was going on. Stacie was driving her insane, but the blonde couldn't decide if the younger girl was acting the same as normal and  _she_  was the one putting more emphasis on things or if Stacie was being, well, more  _Stacie_  with her. Aubrey wasn't sure how to act - acting normal seemed impossible but she wasn't sure what her other option was.

Aubrey felt her stomach drop when rehearsal ended and Stacie left immediately again. Her mind flashed to an image of that guy she saw Stacie meet the other day and Aubrey could maybe finally admit that she was feeling jealous. She wanted Stacie to rush out of some place for  _her_. Aubrey shook the thought out of her head.

"Where did Stacie go?" Chloe asked. "I was going to ask if she wanted to go out bowling with us tomorrow night."

"We're going bowling tomorrow night?"

"Oh yeah, maybe I should ask you too. Do you wanna? I was going to have us go out to the movies but I didn't want Beca to murder me."

"Mm, sure," Aubrey said. "Text Stacie and ask her. Let me know what she says."

Chloe raised her eyebrows. "Why?"

"Because I refuse to be a third wheel to whatever you and the hobbit have going on; the sexual tension alone is enough to make me sick."

"There's nothing going on!" Chloe scoffed. "And look who's talking," she mumbled under her breath as she walked away, leaving Aubrey's mind racing.

* * *

Stacie walked out of the locker room in the campus gym and looked around at all the equipment. Stacie doesn't use the gym ever but she was pretty sure she knows someone who does. She finally spotted the flash of blonde hair she was searching for. She took a moment to appreciate how Aubrey's body moved on the elliptical machine before shifting her eyes away because she didn't want to be creepy.

By some magical stroke of luck, the person on the machine next to Aubrey was just getting off. Stacie grinned to herself and skipped over.

"Aubrey!" The girl looked over, the confusion on her face melting into surprise. "I didn't know you came here," Stacie hopped onto the machine and started fiddling with the buttons, not exactly sure how to make it work.

"Only when it's raining outside," Aubrey motioned to the window where you could see the rain falling steadily. "Is this your first time here?" Aubrey questioned with a slight smirk as she watched Stacie struggle with the machine. Aubrey slowed herself down and came to a stop, stepping off her machine towards Stacie. She pressed a few buttons and told Stacie to start moving her legs. She hopped back on her own machine.

Stacie watched Aubrey, her hair was plopped in a messy bun on top of her head, her skin glistened with a light sheen of sweat. Her workout clothes left little to the imagination and Stacie felt a blush spread across her face as her thoughts took a turn. Aubrey looked over at her and Stacie quickly turned away, knowing she had been caught. She tried to shake it off - she was supposed to be making Aubrey all flustered, not the other way around.

Stacie searched her mind for something to say. Shit, why was she suddenly feeling so awkward? She was pulled out of her thoughts when Aubrey got off her machine and started wiping it down.

"Where are you going?"

Aubrey laughed. "I'm done. You found me too late," she said teasingly. Stacie blushed.

"You're coming bowling tonight, right?"

"I would  _never_ leave you alone with Beca and Chloe," Aubrey said in mock seriousness. Stacie grinned and got off her own machine. Aubrey quirked an eyebrow, "All done already?"

"Yeah, I gave it a try but…" She took a step towards the blonde so they were standing close. "I prefer other means of exercising, if you know what I mean." Stacie winked and Aubrey's face turned bright red. The brunette turned and started walking away. "See you tonight, Bree!" she called over her shoulder.

* * *

The girls were just arriving to the bowling alley when Chloe said, "Oh! I hope you guys don't mind but I invited the rest of the girls. They were starting to be weird about Beca and Stacie getting quote 'preferential' treatment."

"No preferential treatment here," Beca grumbled and Chloe shot her a look.

Inside the bowling alley, CR and Amy had already set them up with two different lanes side by side. Lilly and Denise couldn't make it so there was an even four on each lane.

"Beca, I found your bowling ball," Amy said, holding up what was clearly a child's ball. Beca scoffed in reply.

Stacie slid up next to Aubrey, who was searching the balls for the right one. "So, is there any special tip to finding the right ball?"

"Just search through the balls at the weight you like and find one that your fingers fit nicely into and the spacing feels comfortable. What weight do you usually use?"

"I've never played before," Stacie shrugged.

Aubrey's eyes widened a bit. "You've never been  _bowling_  before?"

"Nope. So help me pick out a ball?"

"But how have you never been bowling before?" Aubrey questioned.

"I don't know!" Stacie sighed. "My parents didn't think it was a good idea. They didn't want me to hurt my hands," Stacie said as she instinctively stretched out her fingers in front of her.

"Wow, I didn't realize they took your piano playing so seriously."

Stacie felt like the conversation was turning a bit more serious than she liked. "Yeah, well, what can I say? I have  _very_  talented and skilled fingers." She winked, grabbed a ball at random and left Aubrey open-mouthed and flustered.

When Aubrey recovered, she narrowed her eyes as they followed Stacie. The girl was messing with her, clearly. Aubrey just didn't know what Stacie's motive was exactly. She needed to find out though.

The girls ordered some pizza and began their games. Aubrey was up first on her lane and got a strike. She grinned, feeling pleased with how impressed Stacie looked. Stacie was up last and her ball went directly into the gutter. She tried again and her second ball followed the first.

"What kind of magical shit does it take to get this ball to travel a straight line?" Stacie huffed. Aubrey chuckled. The next time Stacie was up, Chloe tried shouting advice at her but, again, both of her balls went into the gutter. Aubrey could tell Stacie was getting a little frustrated.

When Stacie's turn came up again, Aubrey stood up with her. "First of all, use my ball. Yours is ridiculous and way too heavy."

"But it's a nice color!" Stacie pouted causing Aubrey to roll her eyes.

"Okay, hold the ball like this. I'm going to help." Aubrey walked around behind Stacie and pressed her arms against Stacie's arms. "Don't let go of the ball, this is just practice," the blonde said as she guided Stacie's arm down, back and then forward again. "When it gets here-" Aubrey stopped the ball in the forward motion, "-let it go. See those arrows up there on the lane? Ignore most of them for now but aim towards the center one. It will help while you get your bearings."

Stacie's heart was beating fast. Aubrey was pressed up tight against Stacie, her words being murmured directly into the brunette's ear. Stacie wasn't even sure she could follow along with what the blonde was saying, she could barely hear her over the hammering of her heart. Stacie could feel Aubrey's heart racing against her back. Aubrey dropped Stacie's arms and stepped aside.

"Uh, okay. But - um, can you show me that one more time?" Stacie asked partly because she couldn't properly pay attention the first time but mostly because she wanted to feel Aubrey against her again. Aubrey complied, going more slowly the second time around.

Stacie put her lesson into practice. It took the ball longer than normal to travel towards the gutter but Stacie could clearly see that's where it was headed. She turned around to shrug at Aubrey when she saw the blonde's expression change. "Stace! Look!" Aubrey was grinning so wide, Stacie almost couldn't bring herself to turn away. She looked down the lane and watched her ball knock down one pin on the very left side.

Aubrey jumped up and down, clapping excitedly. "You hit a pin!" Stacie couldn't help but grin at Aubrey's excitement. She concentrated extra hard with her second ball because she wanted to make Aubrey's face excited again. She watched the ball go down the lane and hit just off center, five of the pins knocking down. Aubrey squealed excitedly and hugged Stacie. "You did it!" Stacie wrapped her arms around Aubrey and swung her in a circle, causing the blonde to laugh.

"Thanks for teaching me," Stacie said almost bashfully.

The pizza came and the girls ate and continued to play. Stacie didn't get another gutter ball in her next several turns and she was feeling pretty pleased with herself. She really liked watching Aubrey bowl. There was a smoothness to her movements, like she was an old pro. And her butt looked  _really_  good in those jeans.

Stacie was talking to Beca who was sitting next to her when she saw Aubrey approach. Aubrey kept her eyes on Chloe, who was taking her turn, but she plopped herself down on Stacie's lap. Beca raised an eyebrow and smirked at Stacie. Aubrey gave no indication to Stacie that this was out of the norm, she just cheered Chloe on and got comfortable. Stacie wrapped her arms around Aubrey's waist to keep her from sliding down. Aubrey leaned into Stacie - like they did this all the time, like it was completely normal and not something that was killing each of them slowly.

Aubrey crossed her arms and slid them up the arms that were around her waist. Stacie's breath hitched. She leaned her head forward and rested her chin on Aubrey's shoulder, squeezing her waist a little tighter. Stacie lost herself in the feeling - she wanted to slow down time.

She felt Aubrey shift slightly as she turned her head toward Stacie's, basically acknowledging her for the first time. "It's your turn, you gotta let go," Aubrey murmured.

"Mm, no thank you." Stacie locked her arms and Aubrey laughed. She tried to get up but Stacie held on tighter and Aubrey laughed harder. Aubrey squirmed and fought against Stacie who had started laughing too. Finally, Aubrey got free of Stacie and turned around to grin triumphantly. Stacie got up and gave the blonde a wry smile. "This isn't over."

The bowling continued until finally they had played their last frame. The girls put their balls and shoes away and the four girls waved goodbye to the other Bellas and made their way home. Beca said bye to Chloe at the door and asked Stacie if she wanted to walk back together. Stacie waved her away.

"Hey Bree," Stacie called as Aubrey was making her way to the door. "Can I talk to you for a second?"

Aubrey nodded but suddenly looked very nervous. Stacie waved bye to Chloe as she went inside. The brunette was fighting her own nerves. Aubrey walked up to her with questioning eyes.

Stacie looked down at her hands. "So, uh - wanna meet before rehearsal tomorrow? For a piano lesson?"

Stacie looked up to see Aubrey's brows knit together. "I don't know, Stace."

"What? Why?"

"I can't-" Aubrey's eyes filled, "-I can't do this." Aubrey had fun flirting with Stacie tonight but it was all becoming too real too fast. She couldn't keep hanging out with Stacie like this, when there was no possibility of something more.

"Aubrey," Stacie's voice cracked.

"What am I to you, Stacie?"

Stacie looked at her confused. "What do you mean?"

"Am I just some challenge? Are you just messing with me?"

"What? Why would think that? Where is this coming from?"

Aubrey choked out a sob and buried her face in her hands. "I don't know. I'm so confused." Stacie immediately moved to wrap her arms around the shorter girl. After a minute, Stacie pulled out of the hug.

"Come with me." She took Aubrey's hand.

"Where are we going?" Aubrey used her free hand to wipe some stray tears away. It killed Stacie to see Aubrey upset.

"Just trust me," Stacie said, bringing them through campus at a brisk pace and into the building where the Bellas practice. Stacie took out a key at the door to the rehearsal room and let them into the dark room. She flipped on just the back lights so it was still dim.

"Why are we here?" Aubrey whispered.

Stacie led her down to the piano and turned to face her. She met the blonde's eyes and Aubrey saw so many emotions playing out in the brunette's. "Will you let me play for you?"

Aubrey didn't trust her voice so she just nodded. Stacie pulled a chair next to the piano in a space where she could easily see Aubrey as she played, though she wasn't yet sure she'd have the courage to look at her. Stacie sat at the piano. "Just so there's no misunderstanding this time… I wrote this for you."

Aubrey sucked in a breath as Stacie started playing. It didn't take a pianist to recognize how talented Stacie was. The younger girl started singing.

_Inside my skin there is this space_  
_It twists and turns  
_ _It bleeds and aches_

_Inside my heart there's an empty room_  
_It's waiting for lightning  
_ _It's waiting for you_

_And I am wanting_  
_And I am needing you here  
_ _Inside the absence of fear_

Aubrey was hardly aware of the tears threatening to overflow or her own irregular breathing. She couldn't take her eyes off of Stacie, her heart pounding out of her chest. She could tell Stacie was trying hard to keep her voice even.

_Muscle and sinew_  
_Velvet and stone_  
_This vessel is haunted  
_ _It creaks and moans_

_My bones call to you_  
_In their separate skin_  
_I make myself translucent_  
_To let you in, for_  
_I am wanting_  
_And I am needing you here  
_ _Inside the absence of fear_

Stacie had her eyes closed until this point but as the next verse started, she opened them and looked directly at Aubrey, causing the blonde's breath to hitch.

_There is this hunger_  
_This restlessness inside of me_  
_And it knows that you're no stranger  
_ _You're my gravity_

She placed emphasis on the last two lines, putting all of her emotions into them. Stacie finished another verse and the song came to an end. She sat for a second, her eyes closed.

"I don't know who you are to me, Aubrey. I don't know what this is." She finally opened her eyes to look at the blonde. "And I'm scared too."

Stacie stood up from the piano and went to Aubrey, leaning in without hesitation until their lips met.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: The song featured in this chapter is Absence of Fear by Jewel.


	5. One True Thing

Aubrey woke the next morning with the distinct impression that the previous night had been a dream. She might have actually been able to convince herself that it was a dream if she couldn't still so vividly feel Stacie's lips on her own. It was a simple kiss, perfect as far as first kisses go. She smiled to herself as she remember how soft Stacie's lips were. Aubrey had never actually kissed a girl before so maybe all girl's lips are that soft but she doubted it.

Aubrey let out a soft sigh. They hadn't resolved anything last night. Stacie kissed her and walked her back home. Aubrey was in such a state of shock that she couldn't bring herself to say anything. Her brow furrowed thinking back on it. She hoped Stacie didn't think she wasn't interested. Stacie had dropped her off, kissed her lightly on the cheek and turned away with an adorable wave. They were going to have to talk about it but Aubrey's never had great experiences in the past when trying to define things as far as relationships go.

Aubrey got up and put on some running clothes, determined to work off her nervous energy somehow. She made her way to the kitchen to fill up her water bottle and grab a granola bar.

"You need to tell me what's going on." Aubrey yelped in surprise as Chloe's voice came out of nowhere. The redhead was leaning against the cabinets in the corner, hidden by the refrigerator door Aubrey had opened to get her water.

"Geez, Chloe. You scared me half to death," Aubrey said as her hand covered her heart.

Chloe sighed in exasperation. "What's going on with you and Stacie?"

"You just asked me this recently, if I recall," Aubrey said, to which Chloe crossed her arms and stared pointedly in response. "Nothing is going on! What's going on with you and Beca?" Aubrey smirked as Chloe's eyes shifted.

"Don't try to turn this around. We're talking about you and Stacie right now," Chloe stomped over and plopped down on a chair by the kitchen table. "She was all over you last night and then she wanted to talk to you when we got home. Then you disappeared."

"Are you done giving me a play-by-play of my evening? I have a run I need to complete." Aubrey walked out of the kitchen without waiting for Chloe to respond. It's not like she wanted to keep anything from Chloe, it's just that she didn't know what to say.  _She_  didn't even know what was going on. She went on her run but it did nothing to alleviate the racing of her mind.

When Aubrey finished, she checked the time on her phone and her heart fluttered when she discovered a text from Stacie.

_[Stacie Conrad 10:18AM] can't make it to piano lesson. surprise essay due tonight that i'll never finish :(_

Aubrey wasn't sure what to make of the text. Her instinct was to assume Stacie was lying and just trying to get out of seeing her. Her instinct was to assume the worse case scenario - that Stacie regretted kissing her last night and needed time to think of a way out. Aubrey took in a deep breath - shaking the crazy thoughts out of her head. She was trying her best to just go with the flow.

_[Aubrey Posen 11:02AM] Surprise essay? Ouch. Prof isn't giving you a lot of time. No prob about the lesson.  
_ _[Stacie Conrad 11:04 AM] oh he gave us 2 wks. i just forgot about it until today. SURPRISE_

Aubrey chuckled at the text. She shot off another one telling Stacie she'd see her at rehearsal. She tried to calm her nerves about the whole thing. Why would Stacie write her an entire song, kiss her… and then change her mind? She wouldn't. Right? Right.

Later that day as she and Chloe walked to rehearsal, the redhead told her she was going to hang out with Beca in her dorm for the evening. Aubrey was about to make a snarky comment about her plans but decided against it since, thankfully, Chloe had seemed to let go of her line of questioning about Stacie for the moment. Aubrey instead spent the rest of the time up to rehearsal deciding if she had the guts to ask Stacie to come over. She decided if Stacie gave her any indication that last night wasn't a figment of her imagination, she'd suck it up and ask. That seemed like solid plan.

Stacie ran into rehearsal 10 minutes late - she shot Aubrey an apologetic look as she took her place. Aubrey was going to let it slide when she saw Amy look back and forth between the two of them, expecting something.

"Nice of you to join us, Stacie," Aubrey said, a tone of disapproval weighing her words.

"Sorry, sorry I-"

"Please don't let it happen again," Aubrey cut her off.

"Yeah, Stace. Usually you're better at finishing your guys off so you can still be on time," Amy teased.

"Alright, that's enough. We're rehearsing, not chatting," Aubrey shouted, her face coloring. Stacie gave Aubrey a worried look. Aubrey knows what Amy said wasn't the brunette's fault, but it really bothered her. She was hard on everyone for the rest of rehearsal.

"Stacie, don't be late again," Amy wheezed, out of the breath. "She's punishing us all."

Everyone groaned in relief when rehearsal was over. Aubrey watched Stacie gather her things, debating on her next move.

"Stacie, can I see you for a second?"

"Good luck, dude," Beca patted Stacie on the back and gave her sympathetic look.

Stacie made her way to Aubrey, looking at her watch. She saw Aubrey's expression change into something unidentifiable. "Sorry, I just kind of have somewhere to be."

"Oh. Well, never mind then. You can go." Aubrey tried to keep her voice light.

"Hey," Stacie said softly as she grabbed Aubrey's wrist to keep her from walking away. "I'm free in an hour. I finished my essay. I was wondering.. if you wanted to maybe do something?"

Aubrey let out the breath she was holding and gave Stacie a small smile. "I was actually going to invite you over to my place to watch a movie. We've done that a lot recently though, if you have something else in mind?"

Stacie grinned. "A movie sounds great. I'll text you in an hour?"

"Okay." Aubrey nodded and smiled.

* * *

Aubrey and Stacie agreed to meet at her house at around 8 to watch a movie. Stacie felt her nerves flare up as she was making her way there. She had to wipe her sweaty palms on her jeans a number of times. She wasn't good at not knowing where she stood with people. And she definitely wasn't okay with trying to decide whether or not to make the next move. Stacie was usually either so confident that she made all the moves without thinking or so confident that she made no moves because she knew the other person would. This was new territory for her, this in between business.

Stacie got to Aubrey's door and took a deep breath before she knocked. Aubrey answered a moment later with a smile and let her in. Stacie tried to act as normal as possible so she plopped on the couch as she typically would and pulled Aubrey's computer off the table to look at the movies.

She looked up when she heard Aubrey chuckle and saw her shaking her head. "You really think I'm letting you pick out the movie? Guess again."

"Aw, come on. Scary is fun! You liked The Exorcist, right?"

Aubrey sat down close to Stacie on the couch. "It's my turn. You pick next time." The blonde stuck out her tongue at Stacie, who was immediately too distracted to put up much of a fight.

Aubrey searched through the movies a little longer and picked out a pretty generic romantic comedy for them to watch. In all honesty, she wasn't concerned with the movie - she didn't think she'd be able to pay attention anyway.

"Can I ask you something?" Aubrey questioned just as they were settling in to start the movie.

Stacie took a deep breath, unsure of where this was going. "Sure."

"Where do you go after practice every day? Or most days, rather."

Stacie let out her breath and chuckled. "Oh, that. A lot of the drama students pay me to accompany them while they practice or for auditions. My practice room is signed out for the year at that time - it was the only time I could get."

"Oh!"

"You sound relieved," Stacie laughed.

"I have a confession to make," Aubrey said sheepishly.

"Go on." Stacie was intrigued.

"I may have followed you the other day to see where you go." Aubrey ducked her head.

"What?" Stacie's eyes got wide. "You stalked me?" Aubrey tensed but relaxed when she saw the glint of humor in Stacie's eyes.

Aubrey nodded, her face warming. "But I didn't put the pieces together - I saw a guy go in there and, well.."

"Well, what?"

"I don't know!" Aubrey felt her face become more red. "I thought maybe, um.. you were meeting to do some, uh, some sort of other activities."

"Oh my god, you are so adorable," Stacie laughed. "I should probably be offended, though."

"Sorry! I don't know why I thought that."

"That boy is gay as a skittle, Bree. Holy shit, you're adorable."

Aubrey playfully slapped her shoulder. "Stop! I am not."

"You are," Stacie nodded with a laugh.

"Ugh-" the blonde said with fake exasperation, "-let's just start the movie."

Aubrey turned off the lamp next to her while Stacie pulled the blanket off the back of the couch and placed it over them. They were sitting close, the sides of their arms touching. Shortly after the movie started, Stacie shifted herself so that her hand was resting on the top of Aubrey's thigh - and suddenly Aubrey was aware of nothing else. She stole a glance at the brunette but she seemed to be watching the movie intently.

Aubrey slowly slid her hand under Stacie's, lacing their fingers together. Stacie gave Aubrey's hand an almost imperceptible squeeze. Aubrey looked at Stacie again who maintained her eye contact with the television. The slowness of this was driving Aubrey insane.

"Stace?" Aubrey whispered, eyes still on the brunette.

Stacie turned her head away from the screen to look at Aubrey. "Hm?"

"I don't want to watch the movie anymore," Aubrey murmured, leaning in close enough to Stacie so their lips were almost touching.

Stacie held out for a beat before closing the distance. She let go of Aubrey's hand and twisted her body for a better angle. The brunette let out a whimper when she felt Aubrey's tongue glide along her bottom lip. She opened her mouth to deepen the kiss as she placed her hands on the sides of Aubrey's face.

Stacie kicked the blanket off of them as she threw her leg over Aubrey so she was straddling the blonde. She felt Aubrey's hands at her hips. Stacie thought the blonde tasted like cotton candy and something else she already knew was so distinctly  _Aubrey_. She's pretty positive she'd be fine if she never got to kiss anyone else again. Stacie pulled her lips from Aubrey's as soon as she became conscious of that thought. That wasn't something Stacie was used to thinking in her first make-out session with someone - or any make-out session with someone, for that matter.

She rested her forehead on Aubrey's, both their chests heaving. Stacie felt Aubrey shift slightly underneath her as the blonde moved her lips to Stacie's neck, placing wet kisses. Stacie gasped when she felt Aubrey gently nipped at her pulse point. She felt her hips inadvertently grind into Aubrey, earning a moan from the blonde which Stacie felt vibrate along her neck.

"Fuck, Aubrey," Stacie couldn't help but mutter; she'd never heard a sound as sexy as that moan. Stacie tilted her head to recapture Aubrey's lips and kissed her hard. Her fingers found their way into Aubrey's hair, scraping lightly against her scalp.

Stacie reluctantly slowed their kiss, taking Aubrey's bottom lip lightly between her teeth before pulling away. She stared down at Aubrey, whose eyes were still closed, and the sight quite literally took her breath away. She had always thought that was such a cliched saying but she could see the truth in it now. Aubrey's eyes opened and met her own.

"Do you know how long I've wanted to do that?" Stacie breathed.

"How long?" Aubrey whispered , wanting an actual answer even if the question was meant to be rhetorical.

Stacie leaned over and placed light kisses in the crook of Aubrey's neck. "Mm, since hood night." She put her head back up to look at Aubrey, seeing the surprise and disbelief in her eyes. "I can prove it," she said into Aubrey's ear.

"How?" Aubrey gasped as she felt Stacie's tongue on a sensitive spot just under her ear.

Stacie sat up a little, still straddling Aubrey, a look a seriousness coming over her as she looked in the blonde's eyes. She stared for a few moments until Aubrey was sure she'd forgotten the question altogether.

"Do you know how many songs I've written about you?" Stacie's voice took on a slight vulnerability. Aubrey saw the brunette's face color slightly at the admission but she didn't move her eyes away from Aubrey. "Because I don't. Too many to count, that's how many. Not all complete, some not more than a few lines, some without any words at all - but too many to count."

Aubrey leaned up to capture Stacie's lips in a needy kiss, using her hands on Stacie's hips to pull the girl closer. A moan escaped Stacie's lips and Aubrey's breath hitched at the sound. She placed a hand gently on Stacie's chest and separated her lips, concentrating on the feeling of Stacie's heart racing under her hand.

"We should slow down," Aubrey whispered.

"Mm." Stacie nodded. She moved herself off of Aubrey's lap and the blonde almost whimpered at the new lack of contact. Stacie ran her hands through her hair and sighed while trying to get control of her breathing. "I should probably go."

"Okay." Aubrey shot Stacie a worried look and the younger girl placed her hand in Aubrey's, giving it a reassuring squeeze.

"Are you doing anything on Friday?" Aubrey shook her head. Stacie started tracing small circles on Aubrey's hand, causing the blonde to shiver. "Would you let me take you out?"

Aubrey smiled. "I'd love that."


	6. Wonderin'

Aubrey narrowed her eyes as she watched Chloe and Stacie talking quietly in the corner. It's not like Stacie and Chloe never talk, but they certainly don't go out of earshot from everyone else to do so. Aubrey made her way over to them.

"So, yeah, I mean I just use that website for all my MLA or APA formatting questions," Chloe said when she noticed Aubrey approaching.

"Oh, cool. Thanks Chlo!" Stacie turned towards Aubrey and feigned surprise at seeing her so close.

"You two are horrible," Aubrey said, shaking her head. "What were you talking about?"

"Composition class," Stacie said with an innocent smile. Aubrey glared at both of them. She has caught them talking a couple of times since she was forced to tell Chloe about her upcoming date with the brunette. It would have just been too difficult to keep it a secret from the person she lives with, plus she was excited and wanted to tell someone. She's not sure if she should be regretting that decision or not.

Stacie leaned into Aubrey slightly, lips close to her ear. "You look really hot when you're pretending to be mad," she whispered. Aubrey felt her face flush. She quickly tried to recover, crossing her arms and spinning around to stomp away. She heard Stacie laugh behind her.

"Alright, everyone," Aubrey shouted into the rehearsal space. "We're going to do some extra cardio today, vertical and non-optional," she directed the last part at Amy. The group groaned. "You can thank Stacie for giving me this excellent idea."

The girls simultaneously glared at Stacie, who stood there open-mouthed, while Aubrey shouted at them to start running up the stairs. Stacie was the last to hit the stairs and Aubrey encouraged her to speed up with a slap on the butt. "Move it, Stace. I'd hate for you to see me really mad," Aubrey said just loud enough for the brunette to hear.

Stacie kept her smirk hidden until she was turned away from Aubrey. She knew there was one place where she could take away Aubrey's control - and she felt herself grow warm at the thought of it. She couldn't wait to strip Aubrey's power from her.

* * *

Aubrey checked herself for the twentieth time in her bedroom mirror. She was wearing a casual kelly green dress, her hair was down and in loose, messy waves around her face. She kept her makeup to a minimum and added just a light, non-sticky gloss to her lips. She was trying to keep her stomach in check - her nerves were threatening to quite literally overflow out of her. She closed her eyes and took a deep breath.

A knock startled her and she rushed to open the door, pausing for a second so she didn't seem too eager. She swung it open and her breath hitched at the sight of Stacie. She was in a high-waisted skirt and a short enough top that her midriff was showing. Aubrey felt the urge to touch the exposed skin.

Stacie smiled and leaned in to give her a kiss on the cheek. "You look amazing," the brunette said, causing Aubrey to blush. "Are you ready?" Aubrey nodded.

Stacie reached out and took Aubrey's hand in her own. The blonde didn't know what they were doing or where they were going but she didn't really care as long as she could hold on to this hand. Stacie stopped in front of a really nice car and opened the passenger door for Aubrey to get in. Aubrey doesn't know anything about cars but even she could see this was nice - nicer than a college freshman should have.

Stacie went around and got into the driver's side, starting the engine and buckling up. She looked over at Aubrey and grinned. Aubrey felt butterflies in her stomach.

"Where are we going?"

"You'll see."

Aubrey could tell she wasn't going to get much more than that from the brunette so she didn't even try. A few minutes into the ride, Stacie reached over and laced their fingers together. Aubrey couldn't help but smile. This was all so new to her - being with a girl, certainly, but being with anyone in general. She wanted to harness the giddy feeling in her stomach.

The sun was setting and Stacie was taking them through a series of back roads, turn after turn, until they were climbing a steep hill. When they crested the hill, Aubrey sucked in a breath at the beautiful view. She had no idea where they were, didn't know there was a view like this anywhere around. They had left the city limits.

Honestly, if Stacie and driven them here and then promptly turned around and dropped her off at home, Aubrey would still have marked it as one of the most beautiful dates she's ever had. Stacie pulled off the road onto a bluff and parked the car. They could see miles and miles in the distance, nature surrounding them.

"I just wanted to stop here for a second, to watch the sun set," Stacie said, smiling.

"It's gorgeous here," Aubrey sighed, a small smile playing on her lips as she watched the sun on the horizon.

The remains of the sun's rays were coming through the window, a fiery red and orange shining on Aubrey's skin. Stacie couldn't look away from her. She was breathtaking.

"You're missing it," Aubrey whispered, not taking her eyes from the horizon but seeing Stacie in the periphery of her vision, looking at her.

"I'm not missing anything." Aubrey pulled her eyes away from the setting sun and met Stacie's, serious and exposed. Stacie leaned in and captured Aubrey's lips in a soft, sweet kiss. Aubrey tilted her head to deepen the kiss but stopped herself. She felt a growing need and knew that if she let herself, she'd not be able to stop.

Stacie smiled at her and pulled the car back onto the road. Another series of turns and the car approached a giant gate. Stacie stopped, rolled down the window and punch in a series of numbers on a keypad and the gate started opening.

Aubrey felt her jaw drop when got towards the end of the driveway and the house came into view. House is probably an understatement. It was huge, the kind she only saw in movies. "Who's house is this?"

"Ours - for the evening," Stacie grinned. She parked the car and let Aubrey out. The brunette went to the trunk and grabbed a few bags. Aubrey quirked an eyebrow but the younger girl just winked.

Stacie gave Aubrey a quick run through of the house without taking her to see everything, saying they'd get to it later. They walked through a tall archway and Aubrey let out a laugh when she saw the marble staircase. Of course there was a marble staircase, as if she should have been expecting anything else.

The whole house was decorated as if it came straight from the 1920s and Aubrey flitted around with a giddy excitement, looking at everything she could, because she was obsessed with that era and she'd never been any place that she felt encompassed it so perfectly.

Stacie brought her to the kitchen and poured her a glass of wine, giving her a soft kiss.

"Are you hungry?" Aubrey nodded. "Good."

She watched Stacie open the double doors that led outside and turn on a grill. She hit a switch and a series of stringed lights turned on. Aubrey's breath hitched at the view as she stepped outside.

"It's not cold out here," Aubrey said, surprised. It was Georgia, yes, but still wintry in the evening during this time of year.

"Mm, yeah. See those on the ground?" Stacie pointed to some vents on the ground around the patio. "They're pushing up warm air, so it's always comfortable out here."

Stacie came up behind Aubrey and wrapped her arms around her waist, resting her head on her shoulder. Aubrey crossed her own arms over Stacie's and closed her eyes as she leaned back into the brunette. She wished she could stop time, right there.

Stacie reluctantly let go to Aubrey to put some food on the grill.

"Whatcha makin'?"

"Salmon, asparagus, mushrooms, peppers - I'm a grill master."

"Salmon is my favorite!"

"I know," Stacie winked.

Aubrey watched Stacie cook while they chatted. Aubrey could see them doing this a lot - making dinner and talking about their days. It freaked her out a bit.

They ate dinner out on the patio and Aubrey noticed what a clear night it was and how many stars were out. This was easily the most romantic evening she's ever had.

"What are you thinking about?" Stacie asked, taking a sip of wine.

"This has been amazing, this whole night," Aubrey blushed.

"And it's not over." Stacie stood and took Aubrey's hand and brought her inside. "Okay so I have a surprise, kind of - if I'm being vain." She brought Aubrey through the house to a room with a baby grand piano.

"Are you going to play for me?" Aubrey's eyes lit up.

"Mhm. Remember when I told you I didn't know how many songs I've written about you?" Aubrey nodded. "I tried to compile a list and I wrote the titles down. Some of them are just music and some are short and some are angsty.. but I'm going to let you pick one."

"Just one?"

"One for now. You know - before you, I'd never sung one of my own songs for anyone. So this is kind of out of my comfort level. I'm kind of hoping you pick one without lyrics," Stacie admitted.

"So, I just pick any title - and you'll play?" Stacie nodded, looking a little nervous.

Aubrey surveyed the list of titles. How was she supposed to pick? She couldn't. She closed her eyes and trailed her finger up and down the list. She stopped her hand and opened her eyes. Stacie leaned over. "Which one?"

"Wonderin'" Aubrey smiled. She liked the title. She heard Stacie take a deep breath.

"Dammit, Posen," Stacie chuckled nervously. "Of course."

"I picked good?" Aubrey grinned, bumping her shoulder against Stacie playfully.

"At least it's not heartbreaking," Stacie sat at the piano and patted the bench next to her for Aubrey to sit there too. Aubrey's stomach filled with butterflies. "I wrote this three weeks ago." She started playing.

_do you know, do you know_  
_I've been thinking about you_  
_all day, all day  
_ _for days and days_

_do you know, do you know_  
_I've been dreaming about you_  
_all night, all night  
_ _for nights and nights_

_and I'm wonderin' if you're wonderin'  
_ _if I'm wonderin' about you_

Aubrey caught herself smiling at the lyrics. She couldn't believe a girl as amazing as Stacie was with her now - it was harder to believe that the brunette had feelings for her for so long and Aubrey had no idea.

_do you know, do you know_  
_if I painted I could paint_  
_each inch of you_  
_from memory I'd paint each  
_ _inch of you_

_if my arms were on a clock_  
_I'd stop the time to be with you_  
_eternity I'd stop  
_ _to be with you_

_my heart is made of instruments_  
_that play this song for you_  
_they bend and twist each simple pitch  
_ _in hopes you'll feel it too_

_and I'm wonderin' if you're wonderin'  
_ _if I'm wonderin' about you…_

Stacie had barely played the last notes when Aubrey's mouth was on hers. She couldn't write songs for Stacie, but she could do this. She kissed the brunette so intensely that the younger girl could only whimper in response. Aubrey let the kiss slow. When she separated her lips from Stacie's, they were both panting.

"You're amazing. That song was amazing," Aubrey said, giving her a light kiss.

Stacie didn't think she had it in her to respond so she took Aubrey's hand and led her back towards the kitchen. She picked up one of the bags she brought in from the car and handed it to Aubrey. The blonde looked inside and found one of her swimsuits. She looked up at Stacie, a little confused.

"I hear you like hot tubs," Stacie grinned.

Aubrey bounced up and down excitedly. "There's a hot tub here?" She clapped her hands together like an excited kid and Stacie couldn't help but laugh.

"Go change. Chloe gave me that suit by the way - I'm not just going through your stuff - yet," Stacie stuck out her tongue.

Aubrey went into a guest room and changed into her swimsuit, nerves finally making their way through to her. She tried to shake them off. When she was fully changed, she looked herself over in the mirror. Chloe had picked her out a blue bikini and she felt more than a little exposed. She took a deep breath and left the room.

She stopped dead in her tracks when she saw Stacie. She was in one of the tiniest black bikini's Aubrey had ever seen. She let her eyes trail up and down Stacie's body, her body growing warm. She saw Stacie's eyes trailing her body too and she blushed.

"Are you ready?" Stacie asked. Aubrey nodded. "It's going to be cold before it's hot." She held out her hand and when she reached the doors to the outside, she started running. Aubrey yelped at the sudden movement and then yelped again when she felt a blast of cold air.

When they reached the hot tub, they were both laughing. They went in immediately because Stacie was right, it was cold out there. Aubrey moaned contentedly as the warm water engulfed her. Before she got all the way in, she gathered her hair on top of her head with a hair tie. She didn't realize it, but she was driving Stacie insane. The brunette had a thing for the older girl's neck, and now it was completely exposed.

Aubrey caught Stacie looking at her. "What?"

"Come here." Aubrey scooted closer to Stacie. The brunette reached under the water and found Aubrey's hand and pulled her close. She moved both of her hands to Aubrey's waist when she was close enough and easily moved the girl on top of her lap.

Stacie leaned up and captured Aubrey's lips. The blonde whimpered when she felt Stacie's tongue slide along her bottom lip. She deepened the kiss and felt Stacie's hands glide from her hips down her thighs and back up again. Aubrey felt herself become desperate with need. She pulled her lips away from Stacie's and reattached them to her neck.

Stacie gasped and bucked her hips slightly when Aubrey bit her neck and then pressed her tongue down to soothe it. Stacie moaned as Aubrey continued to suck on her pulse point. The blonde wanted to mark Stacie as hers. Aubrey took her hands and ran them slowly down Stacie's front - the brunette groaned and arched her back when the hands brushed over her breasts.

Stacie grabbed Aubrey's waist and moved her so her back was to the hot tub's edge as they switched positions. She straddled the blonde and pushed her body flush against hers, feeling their breasts together through their thin swimsuit tops. She took Aubrey's earlobe between her teeth and flicked her tongue. "You are so-" Stacie ran her tongue down Aubrey's neck, "-fucking hot." Aubrey cried out when Stacie bit down lightly.

Stacie didn't know when her pelvis started grinding into Aubrey's or when Aubrey's started grinding into her but it was almost too much to handle. Stacie felt herself getting close with only that minimal friction - and she knew the same was happening to Aubrey based on her moans. It took all her power, but Stacie stopped her hips from moving. She captured Aubrey's lips and slowed them down.

When she ended their kiss, she pressed her forehead to Aubrey's, both girls unable to catch their breath.

"I don't.. I want.. Not here.." Stacie panted, somehow getting her point across to Aubrey.

"So take me home."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: The song featured in this chapter is Wonderin' by Nicole Reynolds


	7. Thump Thump

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: Okay so - this is kinda smut. I'm going to go hide out somewhere... in a church. bye.

Aubrey tried to curtail her growing desire as she and Stacie jumped out of the hot tub and ran inside into the warmth. Aubrey broke out in goosebumps and was shivering. Stacie laughed and placed her hands on Aubrey's arms, rubbing up and down in an attempt to warm her.

"Let's get you dried and changed," Stacie said. She wrapped Aubrey in a towel and brought her to the room where she changed before. "There's another outfit in there if you're too cold for your dress." Aubrey smiled; Stacie had thought of everything.

Aubrey quickly toweled off and opted to change into the jeans and shirt that were in the bag rather than the dress she came in. She walked back out of the room and Stacie was already changed, also in a different outfit.

"You ready to go?" Stacie asked, eager to resume what they had started.

Aubrey nodded. "Shouldn't we clean up first?"

Stacie waved the thought off. "Someone will do it. I've got it covered." She winked and grabbed Aubrey's hand, leading them out. Aubrey looked up at the sky, instantly mesmerized by all the stars. She heard Stacie putting their bags away and then approach her from behind.

Stacie wrapped her arms around Aubrey's waist and placed her chin on Aubrey's shoulder. Aubrey smiled lightly; this was quickly becoming one of her favorite positions.  _That will probably change soon_ , she blushed at the thought, feeling what was quickly becoming a familiar pang of desire.

Stacie chose that moment to tilt her head and place light kisses on Aubrey's neck. Aubrey closed her eyes and focused on the feeling of Stacie's lips on her neck. When she didn't think she could take it anymore, she spun around and captured Stacie's lips with her own. The brunette immediately deepened the kiss, pushing Aubrey up against the car. Her leg pushed between Aubrey's legs, her hands slipped under Aubrey's shirt and splayed over her ribs. Aubrey whimpered, grabbing Stacie by her belt loops and trying to pull her closer.

Aubrey separated their lips and Stacie immediately moved to her neck, making Aubrey moan. "Stace," she panted, bringing her hands up through Stacie's hair. "Stace.. oh my god," Aubrey groaned. "You have to get me out of here." She pulled on the brunette's hair until Stacie's lips came off her neck. Aubrey kissed her softly and pulled her lips away, resting her forehead on Stacie's. "Home. Now."

Stacie just nodded, quickly opening the door for Aubrey and rushing to the other side. She took a deep breath, trying to get a handle on herself.

They drove in silence for a bit, their nerves increasing with every mile. Aubrey reached over and gently took Stacie's hand, making the brunette smile.

"I need to talk to you about something," Stacie said into the silence.

Aubrey felt panic rising within her, she unknowingly squeezed Stacie's hand tight. Stacie looked off the road for a second to glance at the blonde. "No, Bree,,," She took her hand, still clasped to Aubrey's, and moved it over to Aubrey's lap, grazing her thumb over her thigh. "Baby, it's nothing bad."

Despite the panic, Aubrey's heart skipped and butterflies filled her stomach when she heard Stacie call her baby. "Okay," was all she could manage to say.

Stacie's eyes were carefully kept on the road in the front of them but Aubrey was looking at her, waiting for her to continue. Stacie took a deep breath. "Okay. So, I know you know my reputation. The last thing I want is for you to ever feel like you're just.. another notch on my bedpost, or whatever the saying is. You're not that. And," Stacie paused for a second. "I want you to know that I don't want to be with anyone else."

Aubrey squeezed Stacie's hand. "I don't want to be with anyone else either."

Stacie smiled. "So…"

"So.." Aubrey teased.

"So.. I don't want to be with anyone else and you don't want to be with anyone else. So, we can be together, just us."

"I think they have a name for that," Aubrey laughed. Stacie blushed. "Stacie, do you want to be my girlfriend?"

"More than anything."

Aubrey brought Stacie's hand up and gave it a kiss. She was pretty sure she was going to combust with  _feelings_. She didn't know whether she giddy with excitement or almost paralyzed with desire - probably a mixture of the two - and it was painful, but in the best way. Oh and don't forget nervous, very nervous.

"Chloe's out tonight, if you want to go to my place," Aubrey remembered as they approached campus. Stacie opted for Aubrey's place, if for no other reason than she has a bigger bed.

The minute Aubrey unlocked the door, Stacie was on top of her, shutting the door with Aubrey's back. Stacie had discarded her bags and they made their way to Aubrey's room without separating their lips. Stacie wasted no time, grabbing the hem of Aubrey's shirt and quickly pulling over her head, recapturing her lips after.

She ran her hands up Aubrey's exposed skin. Aubrey's breath hitched and she let out a small moan as Stacie ran her hands over her breasts. Aubrey played with the bottom of Stacie's shirt, getting ready to pull it off, when Stacie's hands found hers and removed them. Aubrey furrowed her brows.

"I'm in charge," Stacie purred into Aubrey's ear before nibbling her neck. Aubrey didn't think her desire could increase but Stacie taking control definitely turned her on even more.

Stacie sucked on Aubrey's pulse point while she moved her hands to Aubrey's back, unclasping her bra. She removed the straps and Stacie's hands were immediately on her. She gently pushed Aubrey backwards until the back of her knees hit her bed. Stacie's lips were on hers as she crawled over her on the bed, forcing Aubrey to lay down. She scooted back until her head hit her pillow. Stacie slowed their kiss, her hands running over Aubrey softly. She became less frantic.

Stacie's soft, lingering touch continued for several more minutes. She wasn't in a hurry. A part of Aubrey reveled in the attention, in the gentleness of her. Stacie knew what she was doing, and she was doing it slow. Partly to savor; partly to torture.

Aubrey wanted her more than anything, Stacie's slow hand stoked the fire within her. It didn't help when Stacie withdrew her hand from Aubrey's breast. Aubrey let out a disappointed sigh, feeling lost without Stacie's fingertips on her. It quickly became a startled gasp as Stacie's mouth descended on her nipple.

Stacie sucked it into her mouth suddenly and Aubrey arched her back and cried out. Her fingers and toes went numb and she suddenly felt lightheaded.

"Oh, fuck," Aubrey whispered.

Stacie's hand went back to her breast. Her hair brushed Aubrey's face. Aubrey tilted her head back, anticipating Stacie's lips against hers.

Instead of the hard, passionate kiss Aubrey was expecting, Stacie's lips gently grazed hers. Aubrey whimpered in frustration. She lifted her head, searching for Stacie, wanting to be close to her, but Stacie pulled back.

"Fuck isn't my name, Aubrey," she said softly, teasingly.

"Stacie," Aubrey breathed.

"That's better," she replied and gave Aubrey a soft peck. She was doing this on purpose, like throwing gasoline on a bonfire. "What's my name?"

"Stacie."

"I like the way you say it." She bit Aubrey's lip. "I think I'm going to like the way you scream it, too."

"Stacie," Aubrey moaned, louder.

"Stacie what?"

"Stacie.. please..."

"Please what?"

"Stacie, please fuck me." Aubrey really didn't know what to say and those were the first words that came out of her mouth. Aubrey had never felt this way before about anyone. Just having Stacie close to her was enough to put her entire body on edge. Aubrey felt like she was going to explode.

Stacie's tongue entered her mouth and entwined with Aubrey's own. Her hands roamed Aubrey's body, first back to her chest and then down lower. Aubrey moaned again when Stacie put two fingers inside the waist of her jeans, then she pushed lower.

Aubrey didn't think the desire within her could build any further, but it did. Her hips started to grind, trying to get Stacie's hand lower still, but Stacie again pulled away.

This time, though, Stacie didn't let Aubrey down. Stacie's hand had withdrawn only so she could unbutton and push Aubrey's jeans down.

"You look delicious," Stacie said softly in Aubrey's ear.

Wiggling her hips, Aubrey pushed her jeans further down her legs and then off. All she had on was a pair of black lace panties. Aubrey felt so exposed right then. But it didn't matter, she was with Stacie and Aubrey trusted her with everything. She knew in that instant that Stacie wasn't going to use her or hurt her. So Aubrey lay there, almost completely naked, waiting for Stacie to take her.

Stacie's eyes devoured Aubrey. The hunger within her was beginning to boil over. Stacie's touch, which had been slow and gentle just a few minutes ago, was harder now, more desperate. Aubrey enjoyed that she made Stacie's considerable control slip.

They kissed again, their teeth knocked together. One of Stacie's hands was behind Aubrey's neck, pulling Aubrey to her. The other was inside the band of Aubrey's panties, pushing them down. Suddenly, Stacie let up. Aubrey opened her eyes, afraid the spell between them was broken.

The passion still smoldered in Stacie's eyes, but her expression softened. She looked nervous. "Bree? Are you sure this is what you want?" Her voice nearly broke. She was talking so softly, Aubrey could barely hear her.

"Now is the wrong time to be asking that." Aubrey flashed her a reassuring smile.

"If you don't..." Stacie's voice trailed off, as if she didn't want to contemplate all of the bad outcomes that might be in store for them. Her mask of certainty slipped for a fraction of a second, her vulnerability slipping through. Then it was back in place. "If you don't… You need to tell me now."

In response, Aubrey pulled Stacie to her. For just a second it was Aubrey's turn to be in control. Aubrey forced her tongue into Stacie's waiting mouth, kissing her hard. Aubrey's hands went to the back of Stacie's neck. When Stacie tried to pull away, Aubrey grabbed a handful of her hair and would not let her up. All of the desire that was built up inside Aubrey, all of the passion, she channeled it into that one kiss.

Stacie was tentative at first, but soon gave in. Aubrey's hands went to the bottom of Stacie's shirt. Stacie didn't resist when Aubrey pulled it over her head. Nor did she stop Aubrey when her hands popped open the clasp on her bra. Stacie was already removing her jeans.

Their bare bodies pressed together for the first time as their tongues dueled. Aubrey never wanted Stacie's lips to leave hers again. Stacie's hands were at Aubrey's waist, pushing down the only remaining article of clothing. Aubrey did the same for Stacie.

Laying back on the bed, Aubrey pulled Stacie on top of her. Aubrey's legs were parted and Stacie started to slowly grind herself against Aubrey. Aubrey moaned at the contact. Their lips never separated; Stacie's hands were on Aubrey's face as she continued to kiss her.

Aubrey whimpered in frustration as Stacie rolled to the side. Aubrey tried to wrap her legs around Stacie, but the taller girl was surprisingly strong. Stacie's kisses were softer now. She worked her way across Aubrey's cheeks. Aubrey's hands were on Stacie, cupping her breast, getting her first intimate feel of Stacie's body.

It was Stacie's turn to moan as Aubrey squeezed her breast gently. Stacie left a wet trail of kisses down Aubrey's neck to her shoulder. Her hands roamed Aubrey's body, working their way lower, from Aubrey's arms to her breasts, from her breasts to her stomach, from her stomach...

Aubrey was laying flat on her back and a gasp escaped her lips as Stacie touched her center. Aubrey involuntarily spread her legs at the contact, her body shuddered as Stacie's fingers stroked her, tentatively at first. Waves of pleasure washed over Aubrey and she moaned as Stacie took her nipple in her mouth.

All of the blood in Aubrey's body seemed to have drained out, the room started to spin. Stacie touched her expertly, manipulating her in ways no one had ever done before. Aubrey bucked her hips against Stacie's hand.

Stacie established an easy rhythm that varied just enough to keep Aubrey off balance, but she never let up.

"Fuck, Stacie, that feels good," Aubrey moaned, her hands reaching for Stacie's head. Aubrey wanted to kiss her so badly.

Aubrey grabbed a handful of Stacie's hair and pulled the younger girl to her. As their lips touched, Stacie quickened her pace suddenly and pressed harder.

"Fuck!" Aubrey hissed. She let out a despaired whimper when Stacie's hand stilled for a second.

"Wrong!" Stacie's voice was firm, but teasing.

"Stacie!" Aubrey cried out. Stacie smirked and continued her movements, harder and faster than before, her lips pressed to Aubrey's as her body tensed.

"That's better," she said. Her hand was a blur.

Stacie could feel that Aubrey was close. Her hand moved faster and Aubrey's breathing turned even more ragged, her hips moved in time with Stacie's fingers.

"Ughh.. Stacie, fuck.. Fuck me," Aubrey arched her back and thrashed around on the bed, she was so close.

"Come for me, Aubrey," Stacie murmured in Aubrey's ear.

The tingling started in Aubrey's toes. Aubrey's had many orgasms before but none of them compared to this. She couldn't form words, she could only moan. Aubrey tried to give Stacie some warning, but she couldn't breathe. It was as if all of the sensations in her body were suddenly drawn to Stacie's hand, and then let go all at once.

Aubrey cried out, unaware of exactly what she said. Stacie held Aubrey close to her, their bodies pressed together as she helped Aubrey ride it out. Aubrey vocally let Stacie know exactly how amazing it was and Stacie never let up, never stopped moving.

When it was over, everything stilled and they were suddenly in silence except for their own panting. Stacie looked right into Aubrey's eyes and in that instant, they connected on an even deeper level than ever before.

Stacie leaned in and kissed Aubrey softly. Aubrey flipped her over, taking her control back.

* * *

Aubrey slowly opened her eyes to the morning light. Her legs were entwined with Stacie's, her arm flung over Stacie's waist.

"Morning sleepy," Stacie said quietly, leaning in for a soft kiss. She was propped up on against the headboard, pen in hand, notebook open.

"Mm, hi." Aubrey sat up a little and kissed Stacie's neck. "How long have you been up?"

"A little bit. I was inspired," Stacie grinned, holding up the notebook. "I've had this music for awhile that I just couldn't find the right words for, but I think I've got it."

Aubrey tried to peek over her shoulder. "Will you let me read?" Stacie tensed. "You don't have to, it's okay," Aubrey quickly said.

"No, it's okay. I'm not used to sharing myself like this, but I don't want there to be anything between us, ever." Stacie smiled, and handed over the notebook. Aubrey felt overwhelming emotion she was too afraid to name. She leaned over and kissed Stacie before opening the notebook to the page Stacie had just been writing.

_This feeling in my heart_  
_Can't start to describe what you mean to me_  
_Sweet mystery_  
_When I'm lying in my bed_  
_the thoughts that fill my head_  
_Well, they're ecstasy  
_ _Baby, can't you see_

_I think I will,_  
_I think I might let go_  
_Let myself fall_  
_It does not really matter_  
_If we speak at all_  
_'Cause in the darkness_  
_I swear, I hear the language of your heart_  
_And it says, "Thump Thump,_  
_Let's jump,  
_ _Let's fall in love"_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: The song featured at the end of this chapter is Thump Thump by Jewel.


	8. This Way

"Hi girlfriend," Stacie said quietly, scrunching her nose and making a face she knows Aubrey thinks is adorable.

"You can't do that here!" Aubrey hissed, looking around them.

"No one heard me!"

"But you're too adorable and then I look at you and get all melty and.." Aubrey took a deep breath. "The Aubrey Posen these girls know does  _not_  get all melty." Stacie started laughing.

It had been just two days since they decided they were in a relationship. They both talked it through and decided that they wanted to keep it a secret for awhile, except for Chloe (and probably by extension, Beca). Aubrey didn't want any of the girls distracted or worried about special treatment. Stacie just wanted to keep it something special between the two of them for awhile - plus, it was fun to see how far she could push Aubrey when other people were around.

Stacie got closer to where Aubrey was standing by the white board. "I really want to kiss you right now," Stacie murmured, biting her lip, a teasing glint in her eyes.

Aubrey's face colored slightly but there was no mistaking the desire in her eyes. "I'm going to get you back for that," Aubrey said. She leaned over so her mouth was near Stacie's ear. "-very,  _very_  slowly." Stacie gulped as Aubrey walked away, heat shooting straight to her core. Stacie forgot two can play her game and Aubrey was a worthy opponent.

Stacie joined the other girls in conversation to pass the time before rehearsal started. Amy was talking about her boyfriends and Stacie was already prepared with a big eye roll.

"Do all these 'boyfriends' know about each other?" Beca asked. "And more importantly, do they know about Bumper?" She smirked.

Aubrey's eyes narrowed. "What's going on with you and Bumper, Fat Amy?"

"Uhh, nothing. I'm definitely not making out with him ever. That would be gross." Aubrey rolled her eyes. "I'm thinking about getting with Beca's dad though."

"Ew, gross dude. That is not okay."

"What? He's hot." Amy shrugged. "Judging from your looks Stacie, your dad is probably pretty hot too though. Is he?"

"Dude, no one thinks their own dad is hot. That's so gross," Beca said.

"My dad is dead," Stacie said, bluntly. Aubrey's head shot up and her eyes widened. Everyone in the group was silent for a moment.

"Sorry, Stace. I didn't know." Amy was uncharacteristically serious.

"It's fine," Stacie said, shrugging. Lilly said something quietly and the group turned to her, causing enough of a distraction for the moment to pass. Aubrey was still staring at Stacie but the brunette refused to look at her.

Aubrey caught up with Stacie after rehearsals ended to walk her to the music department for one of her accompanist appointments.

"I didn't know about your dad."

"That's because I didn't tell you," Stacie said quietly.

"Why?"

Stacie shrugged. "It didn't come up."

"How long?"

"3 years, 4 months, 12 days." Stacie said it robotically and automatically, like it was as easy and simple as knowing two plus two is four.

Aubrey reached over and took Stacie's hand, knowing words weren't what she needed. She had initially been upset with Stacie for not having told her but she realized she was just hurt that there was something so huge she didn't know. To be fair, there were some big things that Aubrey hadn't told Stacie either. Aubrey resolved to get to know as much about the brunette as humanly possible.

* * *

Aubrey's eyes widened when Stacie stopped them in front of a huge truck. "I'm pretty sure this isn't what you were driving on our last date."

"That wouldn't work for what I want to do tonight."

Aubrey raised an eyebrow but silently accepted Stacie's boost up into the truck. Stacie went around to the driver's side and hopped in. She leaned over to give Aubrey a soft kiss. Aubrey cupped the brunette's face, quickly sneaking her tongue past Stacie's lips, earning a soft a moan from the younger girl.

Stacie pulled away. "Okay if you keep doing that, we'll never even make it off campus."

Stacie started the truck and began driving. After a few miles, Aubrey noticed it was the same route they took on their previous date. The sun was already down and Aubrey was disappointed they wouldn't be able to watch the sunset from the bluff again.

The further out of the city they got, the more spaced out everything became. Aubrey loved the countryside and she wasn't sure if Stacie knew that or if it was just a lucky coincidence. She was pulled from her thoughts as Stacie veered the truck off the road and onto a dirt path that she's pretty sure no one would ever even notice unless they knew it was there. The path opened into a large field, surrounded by woods on all sides. Aubrey thought it was the perfect combination of open space and seclusion.

Stacie drove into the middle of the field and cut the engine. She turned to Aubrey and smiled before hopping out of the truck.

Aubrey opened her door. "Is this where you're going to murder me?"

"I have not gotten nearly enough sex out of you yet to murder you," Stacie teased, sticking out her tongue. Aubrey gave her arm a playful smack.

Stacie led Aubrey towards the back of the truck and went behind her to wrap her arms around the blonde's waist just as Aubrey looked up. Stacie felt the older girl's breath hitch and she smiled, her lips on Aubrey's shoulder.

"I've never seen so many stars," Aubrey breathed, barely above a whisper, as if she was afraid they would hide if she spoke too loudly.

Stacie let Aubrey go and busied herself in the truck bed as the blonde continued to be mesmerized. Finally Aubrey looked over to see Stacie laying out several large blankets and pillows.

"Come on, let me help you up," Stacie reached for Aubrey's hand, easily pulling her up. There were so many blankets laid down that it felt like they were on an actual bed. Stacie pulled Aubrey down and put several blankets over them. They were able to lay down and look up at the stars. Aubrey snuggled closer to Stacie and let out a contented sigh.

"This is so perfect," Aubrey said quietly.

"Mhm," Stacie agreed. "It's hard to imagine anything with you not being this perfect." Stacie held Aubrey's hand underneath the blankets, her thumb running across the blonde's lightly. She was quiet for a few moments.

"How do you know about this place?" Aubrey felt Stacie's thumb still for just a second before it started again. Stacie didn't say anything for a bit.

"I grew up here." Stacie felt Aubrey turn to her.

"What?" Aubrey's brows knitted in confusion. "But your audition application said-"

"Yeah, no. I mean, I put where I was born on the application."

"Why?"

Stacie shrugged. "I don't know, actually." She let out a small laugh. "I just didn't want to be the local girl." Stacie waited a beat before continuing. "That was my house.. on our first date. Well, not mine. My mom's now."

Aubrey's eyes widened. "You grew up in that house?"

Stacie nodded. Both girls were silent for a moment before Stacie went on, seemingly changing the subject. "I know you were upset the other day."

"When?" Aubrey stopped looking at the sky to look at Stacie for a second, but the brunette continued staring up.

"When you found out about my dad.. I know you were upset you didn't know already and it got me thinking about everything we still have to learn about each other." Stacie finally looked over at Aubrey. "So let's start tonight."

"Tonight?"

"Yeah. We've got blankets, stars and hours of darkness," Stacie said. "And I may have even packed a snack."

"You are so cute." Aubrey gave Stacie a light kiss. "You start."

"That's not fair. You already got a big one out of me."

"Amy got a big one out of you, actually."

Stacie huffed out a breath of air. "Fine." She thought for a moment. "Hey! You already got that I grew up here and that that was my house; that's like three things. You go."

Aubrey let out a small sigh. "Okay, okay. Let me think." She looked up at the stars, her mind racing with all the things about her that are unknown to Stacie. Should she start with simple and happy? Or go big and bad? She closed her eyes and focused on Stacie's hand in her own. "Hmm. One of my biggest fears is that I'll spend my whole life trying to make my dad proud and I'll never succeed."

It was such a sad fact and Stacie could tell Aubrey was trying not to sound as vulnerable as she felt. Stacie turned her face towards her but Aubrey was determined to keep looking at the stars. Stacie examined her profile and she felt her heart clench with so much emotion for this amazing girl, it actually hurt.

"He must be proud of you. How can he not be?" Aubrey just shook her head but wouldn't say more. Stacie squeezed her hand. "I'm afraid my dad wouldn't be proud of me either, if he were alive."

Aubrey finally turned her head to look at Stacie. "Why?"

Stacie sighed. "He had such big goals for me. It was always our dream that I'd go to Juilliard and be some sort of renowned pianist." A light smile came to Stacie's lips but just as quickly her brow furrowed slightly and she frowned, lost in a thought.

"What is it?" Aubrey questioned lightly.

"I got into Juilliard," Stacie said quietly. "But I couldn't.. I just couldn't be there. Playing for my audition was the first time I played in 2 years." Aubrey's eyes widened but she didn't say anything, waiting for Stacie to continue. "I thought maybe if I got in, I could make myself play but I didn't have the heart for it. After that, I made myself accompany people so I wouldn't have a choice but to play. I didn't play on my own time or my own music until.." Stacie trailed off.

"Until what?"

"Until you." Aubrey's pulse quickened. She leaned over to place a soft kiss on Stacie's lips, wrapping her arm over her waist. She put her head on Stacie's chest.

"I'm so glad you play." Aubrey wanted to tell Stacie that her dad  _would_  be proud of her because she's amazing and smart and so talented.. but Aubrey didn't know Stacie's dad and she hated when people told her that her dad is proud of her. Because they don't know - they don't know anything.

"I was so mad at him, you know? I was so mad he died. I started doing things to spite him." Stacie laughed bitterly. "Like learning how to play the guitar. I always wanted to and he wouldn't ever let me. I threw myself into playing that so I could still write songs without having to play the piano."

Aubrey let her fingertips trail up and down Stacie's arm. "I want to hear you play."

"Yeah?" Stacie smiled. "You might be in luck."

Stacie hopped up and jumped off the truck.

"Where are you going?"

Stacie didn't answer but Aubrey heard her open the truck door. A few moments later, Stacie was back holding a guitar. Aubrey grinned. Stacie settled back onto their makeshift bed and put the guitar in her lap, strumming a few times and adjusting the strings.

"Would you like to hear my most recent song? I wrote it for you."

"Of course, always." Aubrey's stomach flipped. She wondered if she'd ever get used to this - she hoped not.

Stacie started playing and Aubrey was in awe of her skill. The music was so beautiful. She looked up at the huge expanse of stars overhead before looking at Stacie and her heart felt so full that she couldn't help her eyes filling briefly. Everything was so perfect in this moment - she wanted to hold onto it forever.

Stacie's voice began, quietly at first.

_Love be still_  
_Love be sweet_  
_Don't you dare_  
_Change a thing_  
_I want to photograph you with my mind  
_ _To feel how I feel now all the time_

_Say that you'll stay_  
_Forever this way_  
_Forever and forever_  
_That we'll never have to change_  
_Don't move_  
_Don't breathe_  
_Don't change_  
_Don't leave_  
_And promise me_  
_Say you'll stay_  
_We'll stay  
_ _This way_

Aubrey didn't know how Stacie managed to find the song in her heart and put it in words. She felt a tear slip down her face but she didn't move to wipe it away, afraid to break the spell of the moment.

_I get afraid_  
_Don't think ahead_  
_Lets just stay_  
_This way in bed_  
_Feels so good inside your arms  
_ _Home is everywhere you are_

_Say that you'll stay_  
_Forever this way_  
_Forever and forever_  
_That we'll never have to change_  
_Don't move_  
_Don't breathe_  
_Don't change_  
_Don't leave_  
_And promise me_  
_Say you'll stay_  
_We'll stay  
_ _This way_

Stacie finished her song and put her guitar aside, rushing to put her arms around Aubrey.

"You're crying," she murmured into the blonde's neck.

Aubrey pulled out of the embrace and wiped her cheeks. "You're just so amazing."

Stacie's face reddened slightly. She leaned in, capturing Aubrey's lips in a kiss that quickly turned heated. Before Aubrey knew what was happening, she felt Stacie's hands under her shirt. She moaned lightly and pulled her lips away from Stacie's, placing her hand on Stacie's chest.

"Stop for a second," Aubrey said, panting slightly.

Stacie's hands fell out from under Aubrey's shirt, a look of worry coming over her face. "Is something wrong?"

"No, no, nothing. Everything is perfect," Aubrey assured her, placing a peck on her lips. "I just have something to say."

"Oh, so you just need your mouth free then." Stacie's lips attached themselves to Aubrey's neck. Aubrey groaned. She grabbed Stacie's face and pulled it away until she was looking into Stacie's eyes.

Stacie saw the seriousness in Aubrey's eyes and immediately stopped resisting, worry rising up in her even though Aubrey just said nothing was wrong.

"Stace.." Stacie watched Aubrey's eyes fill and noted the vulnerability in her voice. Stacie took a deep breath, her pulse quickening. "I love you." It was barely above a whisper and Stacie thought for a second her mind was just playing tricks on her. She tried to swallow past the lump in her throat, her own eyes filling against her will.

"I love you too." She brought her lips to Aubrey's face and placed light kisses over both her cheeks, tasting her tears. She pulled back and looked at Aubrey. "I think I've loved you for a long time."

For the rest of that night, they forgot about what they didn't know about their pasts. They didn't worry about what was going to happen in their futures. They stayed in that moment, under the stars, hands memorizing each other - both feeling like no greater love than theirs ever existed.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: I'm struggling with this - I had a clear vision when I wrote the first three quarters of this story and then I lost it somewhere halfway into this chapter. For now, unless inspiration strikes, I am going to call this story complete. If you liked this and are sad to see it over, don't worry - I have lots of other ideas and they are all Staubrey. :)
> 
> P.S. The song in this chapter is This Way by Jewel.


End file.
